I have the ability for subtlety particularly to observe people's behavioral aspects. This aptitude often turns out to be a condemnation. Things that I wish would go unnoticed the most, becoming curved in mind indeed feels like a curse.

Like last afternoon.

The place I am residing right now is far away from the city. If I want to grab a coffee I will have to get ready, cross a long sunny road, change vehicle 3/4 times, and only then after hours I can reach the city and have a coffee!
I am usually a very sluggish person when I am home. If I could, I would never go out.

But gentleman, that's coffee craving we are talking about!

So after a couple of days, the craving for a smoke and a perfect coffee time pushed me to go this far! Came to the city. To get a cup of coffee!

What sweet coincidence it is that he knocked right at that moment! He discovered throughout the conversation that I came to the city though I had every intention not to meet him!
: Wait for me. I'll come by.
: No! Need to go back before it gets dark!
: We still have 3 hours!
: I don't want to roam around in this hot weather!
: Then we will find a cool coffee shop!
: No, coffee time should be only in the afternoon or evening!
: You are broke. I will treat you coffee. As many cups as you want
Sometimes I surprise myself with the way I behave with him. The person I have ever been so sassy with.

I never knew a grim, self-conceited, quiet, awkward puppet like me can be such sassy!

However, he knows how to win over and he makes his way through to convince me for a cup of coffee. He smells sweat. He had a long exhausting day at university and he waited extra 2 hours before he meet me.
I thought he would go home. But he waited outside. Smoked and waited with a little hope.
Until I had subsided my salty mood and agreed to meet. Because he said he has discovered an amazing place that has the best coffee and brownie of the city!

I wish I knew what he wants from me. I mean I take only words as payment for some specific business. I do appreciate the gesture, but if that is a thing like "I LOVE YOU" I need to hear that, clearly. I will care for gestures later.

And that pisses me off so much. Every time I feel like I have had enough with these half-assed contradicted emotions, yet, I could not leave him. He does not let me. I often wonder why is it that I suffer and accept this annoying coward bastard.

We were sitting beside the road. That's our usual favorite place. I was angry because he would not let me smoke. After all, it's a public place and people are prejudiced here. They might create a scene. But as stubborn as I am I went to buy smoke on my own.
And couldn't find anything, annoyed me looked back and caught a glimpse of him.

He was gazing at me. All this time I assumed from the gesture. He was smiling. Very affectionately. As if enjoying, watching his beloved one while he is spoiling her with absolute indulgence.
My heart skipped a couple of beats.

When you see a man looking at you while grinning for no reason as if you are the most enchanting treasure he has ever achieved!

You will know how it feels! If you ever have a chance to experience that. And you will know when you look into those eyes.

It was breathtaking! It was overwhelming! And I hate him. And then I realize even after being so disappointed, why I never could leave him. I love the attention, the priority, the emphasis I possess over his life. I rejoice that very much love that.

For one second, as surreal as it sounds I even thought if he asks me to date him, I might give in! I desired for a moment that he would stop treating me instead of someone out of his league and demand me for himself!

Damn! I cursed myself! Coffee is the culprit of everything. And heavens he would always make the best coffee dates anyone can ever expect. And not even pre planned. Nevertheless, sweet yet subtle, simple yet enjoyable, grandeur yet effortlessly pleasant!