If you value your relationship, then you should read these tips on how to keep the fire 馃敟 of your love burning.
These tips would help in spicing up your relationships; be it love, marital, business or family relationships. These nuggets were inspired by the words of my Mentor, Gbeminiyi Eboda
Appreciate your Spouse
Never belittle your partner.
Those who belittle others are only trying to reduce others to their small size.
Familiarity they say breeds contempt. Do not get so used to your partner that you do not acknowledge their efforts no matter how seemingly insignificant you think they are.
Fight for your partner, defend him/her. As a matter of fact, you should magnify their efforts. Whatever you appreciate, appreciates. What are you thankful for in your spouse?
Avoid Jealousy
Don't be overbearing. Stop being a monitoring spirit. Give your spouse some breathing space. Don't make your spouse shut down every other relationship because s/he's now in love with you.
Control your Anger
It is a given that your spouse will hurt you over and again. You can choose to be reactionary and give it back to him/her almost immediately thus blowing it all up. Or, you can choose to walk away to think things through and respond to the situation when you're sure to be in charge of your emotions.
If you can delay anger, you can defeat it. Delayed anger is defeated anger.
Forgive
Love sometimes hurts 馃槶 but not intentionally. Look past the hurt and choose to see through the heart 鉂わ笍 of your partner. Be quick to forgive and let the hurts go. I learnt something today about forgiveness and I've made a commitment towards it. Here it is:
Write hurts on sand and engrave acts of kindness on stone.
I used to express my hurts on paper 馃摑 especially when there is no one to share it with. With what i learnt today, i tore out the pages of my journal where i expressed those hurts cos i don't want to remember them again.
It's okay to vent your anger on paper if that helps you to cool off , but always remember to discard the anger sheets as i call it
Attitude is Everything in a Relationship
As it is in life that attitude is everything, so also is it in relationships. How do you communicate with your spouse? You know, you can be right but wrong at the top of your voice.
Have you been lording it on her? Have you been a nagging babe? It's time to identify and deal with those attitudes that have been quenching the fire of your love.
If your attitude is like a deflated tyre, you won't get anywhere until you change it.
Be Happy 馃槉
How does your personal happiness impact on your relationship? You cannot give what you don't have. If you are not happy, you cannot contribute happiness to your relationship
Happiness is a choice. What constitutes happiness is when you allow your life to be guided by your highest ideals.
Start by choosing to be happy so that your happy spirit can rub off on your spouse and your relationship.
An unhappy person will carry that sourness into the important relationship in his/her life.
Commit to Personal Development
The best of you is still in you. Take advantage of every growth opportunity you have.
Your both commitments to personal growth and development will yield the growth and development of your relationship.
Building effective relationships starts with building ourselves.
Communication
May be this should have been number 1. You will make a mess of your relationship if you don't communicate effectively. Effective communication starts with active listening.
Below are some pitfalls to avoid in order to be an effective communicator:
- Don't always hold on to your opinion as the best.
- Never raise your voice (remember you can be right, but wrong at the top of your voice.)
- Don't always have the last say.
- Don't listen to respond, rather, listen 馃憘 to understand
Thank you for taking out time to read this piece. You might want to check out some other posts by me 