The first time I actually did experience a butterfly in my stomach was in secondary school.
I was the girl most guys do not want to relate with anyways, because I couldn't relate to every shenanigans they talk about, nor about the latest movie, or about going to parties.
And it wasn't because I was born again then, no, it was just more of values I grew up with. I didn't even have any particular friends growing up, so who will invite me to parties or discuss "boy" issues with me?
Lol.
The one thing you can find me doing is reading books. I have been reading books since the 20s' and it is there I find succour. Not in guys or friendship or parties or any of those things.
Anyways, I was the second best student in secondary school then, and by chance the library perfect. so I have few people who want to be in my circles, but trust me, I'm really selective when it comes to my friends.
Friendship to me involve commitment, intentionality from both end, be valuable, be willing to evolve beyond where you are now. I can't do friendship when you're not evolving yourself, I'd leave you behind and that will not be good for the both of us and also, I shouldn't be worried about where I stand in your life. I'm too old to be worrying please 😅.
And most people rarely tick the box. They just want to "famz" you because of who you are or the position you hold.
My butterfly in the stomach story began in senior secondary school 2.
Then, there was this new guy who just joined us in SS2, he was fair, tall, and he has the kind of handsomeness that would make you look back at him twice or even more.
But not me anyways, I don't like too fine a guy, don't be too fine please. Just be normal.
He came into the school and caused a rancour. All the students from SS1 down to SS3 were always coming to our class just because of him. Everyone was trying (so hard) to engage him one way or the other.
At some point, I heard some students were even fighting over him. lol 😅
And the weirdest part was that, he showed no interest in any of them. He was just there.
Our first physical encounter happened on a random day like that, when I stood up from my seat to go to the staffroom to see the principal, he sits by the last chair towards the middle of the class, immediately I got to his side of the chair, he stretched out his legs and since I wasn't looking I almost fell, because I tripped over his legs
It wasn't funny to me, because we aren't friends, so why would you do that?
He apologized and said he was just trying to get my attention. LOL 😅.
I dare say I was the only female who intentionally not give him face.
And that was the beginning of my ordeal.
We started talking. Whenever he needed help with anything, he always come my way, and I try to help in the way that I can.
That axiom that says "communication breeds attraction" is so real
Before I knew what was happening, my hard girl started breaking and feelings start growing from within me.
I began to notice really minutes thing about him, how he walks, how he talks, how he laughs...
Oh God! It was embarrassing and I tried to keep my feelings at bay.
I didn't tell him anyways, and I thought I had it under control.
But my classmates found out!
Oh dear!
How they did, is what I don't know, maybe I didn't hide it well enough anyways.
For the longest time, I was tormented ehn. my classmates didn't allow me breatheeeeee, infact the teachers got to know about it.
They started conjoining our names together.
Whenever the attendance is going on, you'd hear "Akanno" the whole class will shout "Joke" which is a combination of his surname and my name.
We finally finished secondary school, we stop communicating, and I was able to heal properly from my crush fallacy.
Well, we still talk now, but all the feelings have gone down the drain.
Maybe I have matured 😄.
Image from me.
Gif from the gif tenor.
