A law that says you cant transfer bitcoin to an address?
That's literally its only function. ;)

I don't think you have enough respect for how undeniably valuable all the dapps of the future will be. The decentralized exchanges will eventually just be better than the centralized ones in every way. These networks arent going to be toothless forever.

Also the amount of cooperation between centralized exchanges required to shuffle around Bitcoin that doesnt exist is insane. Not an easy secret to keep whatsoever.