ps - I rephrase this sentence
The "Incels threat" is another consequence of the gender divide caused the clash between patriarchy and feminism, and detrimental to both genders men and women alike.

Most of what you say here resonate with my take

"Men are tired of being held accountable for everything"

But in my view such an upbringing is the result of patriarchy
Maybe our definition of patriarchy is different ?

I regard men and women as two complementary forces which cannot compete -- and feminism has too done serious damage to relationships and which is why there are so many single mothers - feminism forbids women to be nurturing toward their mate and encourages to only take from them and move to the next if it does not work

I feel however that we need to get rid of the labels to rebalance relationships

Thanks for your comment