Everytime I woke up, I always had this feeling, the feeling that I always need to show them how happy I am even though I'm not. It's like another day to struggle and another day to suffer and to feel the "pain" with no one else besides you.
I tried to do my best but I think my best wasn't enough. I always thought of ending my life and to end this suffering. But you know what? I can't. I just can't because there's this something in my head that says, "What if". What if I will die what will happen to my family, my sister, my brother, and my parents? If I will die they will just suffer and it will just make things worst. But all I can say is I'm not happy anymore and I'm such in pain.
I always ask myself "Why?". Why does this happening to me? Why is it I'm always like this? Why is it I can't be happy? Why is it? Just why? I don't know what to do anymore. I tried to talk to someone but I don't think they'd understand.
They just think that I'm just making up some drama. But please I beg you to listen even just for once because that's all I wanted and could help to ease my pain.
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