I've had this leather-bound notebook with me for quite some time now. Even though it doesn't look old or worn off, the yellow pages inside it do make me squirm in delight, as I've always associated these kinds of pages with a thing from the past.
Sometimes I take it out and run my fingers over it. I only dared to soil one of its pages with this fancy looking feathered dip pen I got, which really didn't turn out well as my handwriting is below average at best. So besides that, all the pages had been left untouched. That was until now.
I'm known to all my close ones as a hoarder. Whether because of growing up in a middle-class family, or just being borderline cheap in nature (I don't know, really), I have always liked to store away the fancier or nicer looking things. There are many scrapbooks and pens and other sorts of things I have stored away, deeming them worthy of future usage, even though that future never came. Not yet, at least. But as I've been teaching myself to be a little bit braver these days, I also thought, why not let myself indulge in these too? There is ultimately oblivion waiting at the end of the line for us all anyway. So what's the point of storing things away for later, when that later might not even come?
With that in mind, I've started to pull away from this habit of mine. The things I've stored away, now I've begun to use them little by little. And with that, I've decided to use this notebook of mine too.
And so the journey of writing a journal, begins.
I have written diaries a few times before this. They were unstructured, and at best, monotonous. Never before have I tried to make something look as fancy as this one. I looked up some general topics to write on, and I'll be doing follow up posts now and then to keep myself updated, and to see how long I can keep this running.
I am an artist, But I'm nowhere near a great one. A couple of clicks on Pinterest gave me some ideas as to what journals look like, which honestly led me to feel more talentless. People really go all out on their journals, showcasing what they are and what they like. As I'm an unstructured soul, this will no doubt end up looking unstructured as well.
But as I have begun, the ending of my journal journey has already been written. And as the first page of my journal suggests, IN INCEPTUM FINIS EST, meaning: