Why do we sometimes feel the most lonely when we are around other people?
At least I often feel that way. Luckily I enjoy my own company. I can go alone for a long time before I start to long for someone to be with. But sometimes, when I'm with others, the feeling of loneliness comes creeping. When I'm with people I don't have anything in common with, and that I'm not on the same wavelenght with. I get lonely, even though I'm not physically alone.
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A kind of emptiness. I feel out of place. I don't want to talk or interact with anyone. I want to get away. I feel uneasy. The missing common ground with the others make me feel unwanted and useless. Almost like the feeling of being less worth, although I know I'm just as good as them. I wonder why we should use our time on each other, when none of us really wants to be there.
Am I the only one who thinks this way?
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As I get older I find myself more and more in these kind of situations. Through meetings and work, and through my children's school, day care and spare activities. I'm placed with people I never would have been with if I could have chosen myself. Even so, both parties must acknowledge each other and make the best out of the situation. We end up doing a fake theatre performance with polite dialogue about nonsense. We have limited time here on earth, why waste it with empy courtesy?
It would have been easier if I could have done whatever I wanted in this world, and shrugged away from all these situations. But that's just not possible. To spend time on things I don't want is a part of behing a human. Meanwhile, I doubt it would be smart to say what I feel to this people. Then I would look like I thought myself better than them, and could end up hurting them, even though they might feel the same. It's enough wars in the world all ready.
Better be polite. The show must go on.