It's been hard to keep up.
One minute I want to be like this person, the next I want to be like another. So many role models and yet I don't know if I have a role to model.
It all started from childhood. I struggled to gain acceptance from my parents. It was hard for my father to tell me..
You're doing well son.
It was difficult to know if I needed to do better because it was as if what I did never mattered. Then I went to school. I began to copy other kids who I believe were better than me in some way. I would copy a colleague's walking step, his eating pattern even down to his handwriting. I would copy everything.
I needed people to like me. I wanted to be likeable. The harder I tried, the more I drove people away from me.
I just wanted to be appreciated. Just wanted to feel like I mattered. What I do? I want it to matter.
Then I got to the university and I still struggled to gain acceptance from peers, teachers, people around. It was just a bad ditch I found myself in.
Why am I telling you this story?
Because I think if you and I could just stop for a moment and think of the fact that we are appreciated a lot more than we know it...
If we stop to reason that, we have done a lot of good and whether we are recognized for it or not doesn't make our work null and void...
If we did these things, I think life would be a lot simpler. I mean really simple.
Sometimes, I catch myself making a post, or a video or something because I want to show that I "belong" or that I am "knowledgeable" and thereby get some recognition.
Recognition is good. It carries with it a jolt of dopamine rush every time some says...
You've done well...
And sincerely, we should be appreciated and also give appreciation in situations that demand them. But we must never get to the point where we do what we do because we want appreciation or human praise... what if no one appreciates the good work you do?
Here is the conclusion of the matter...
I do not seek appreciation or acceptance. I do what I believe to be right and if people think it is right then they appreciate me for the same, If not? Nothing changes.
