Are you sad when others are succeeding? Does your success seem hooked in to someone else’s failure?
“Keeping up with the Joneses” is an expression that's commonly wont to describe the attitude of always eager to continue with the neighbours in terms of possessions and eager to have the items that our neighbours have.
Envy is another word which will be wont to describe this frame of mind. this is often a really appropriate word because it encompasses greed, jealousy, resentment and a robust desire for something somebody else has, usually at whatever cost.
Unfortunately, it's an attitude that's widespread, not only in Zambia, but everywhere the planet . Throughout our childhood and most of our adult life, competition is that the order of the day. Right from our college days we are taught that our egos is measured in reference to people .
At school, our grading system gives you variety at the top of the term. If you “pass number one” meaning you're the simplest in your class. If you “pass number 25” meaning there are 24 other kids that are better than you're . So if you would like to be favorite and “win” you want to confirm that each one the opposite kids “lose” and pass number two or more.
Wait a moment though, why can’t all the youngsters in school pass number one? Why must we compare one child to another? an easy pass or fail remark on the report could be sufficient without necessarily stating numbers. Unfortunately for youngsters , parents take these numbers very seriously.
This carries on through life. The boss must make sure that he doesn't allow his juniors to urge an excessive amount of knowledge or qualifications if he's to stay his favorite spot because the head within the company. In fact, sometimes he must deliberately frustrate any efforts by his subordinates to progress.
Even amongst friends and relatives this happens . Sibling rivalry doesn't always end when children get older . tons of times it continues. The success of 1 child in adulthood is measured against the success of another. It seems whatever we've achieved seems insignificant in comparison to what so then has done or acquired.
There are several reasons why envy is such a drag . Firstly, if you're envious of another person’s success meaning you'll never be satisfied with anything you ever achieve. the very fact remains that the majority times there'll always be someone that does better than you in some area.
Secondly, if you're envious of other people’s success it means you've got no clue what you would like for your own life. simply because the Joneses have it or do that which doesn't mean you ought to have it or roll in the hay . Will it assist you in achieving your own objectives and “minding your own business?” If you've got a transparent vision for your life, what another person achieves or acquires won’t matter: you'll know exactly where you're , why you're there, where you would like to travel and what you would like to try to to to urge there.
Thirdly, carried to some extremes, envious people will even attempt to cripple the progress of others and stop it if possible. instead of channel their energy into their own success they channel it into this very unproductive mindset: backstabbing, sabotaging, destroying at every chance they get and spending their clock time on brooding about others rather than thinking of the way to enhance their own situation.
When it involves succeeding in life there are three basics mindsets that folks tend to possess . These are the win/lose mentality, the lose/lose mentality and therefore the win/win mentality.
People with a win/lose mentality would be people who compare themselves to people all the time. They believe that so as for them to succeed others must fail. To them, success is relative.
Those with a lose/lose mentality believe that they will never achieve anything worthwhile so why should they allow you to do so. they struggle to stay people within the sinking boat that they're in. Negativity is that the order of the day for them. Don’t ever attempt to tell such folks that you've got great plans for your life – they're going to only criticize you and tell you it can’t be done. After all, they tried that already and it didn't work!
Dreamers, who are achievers, have the win/win mentality. Not only do they know that they're capable of and can succeed, but they realise that their success doesn't depend upon other people’s failure. To the contrary, their success depends on other people’s success.
If you're to achieve life and become the person you're meant to be, then you want to know that you simply won't get there alone. Therefore you want to help others to succeed and to become great if you're to be great yourself. it's often said that the best people are always people who help others.
Learn to be happy about others’ success and appearance forward to your own success. don't judge yourself supported what others have achieved, but rather supported what you would like to realize . counting on what you would like in life, their success might be failure to you or the other way around , but it shouldn't interest you either way.
Life isn't a race against people . it's a 1 man race. you identify the destination, the route, the deadlines and therefore the prize. We are all running a special race. How does one compete with someone that's not on an equivalent track as you are?
Envy and jealousy are habits you want to always be weary of and stay beyond . Like other bad habits they're going to only rob you of your energy, creativity, drive, clarity of mind and enthusiasm for all times .
Stephen R. Covey, in discussing this subject states: “Win/win is predicated on the paradigm that there's plenty for everyone , that one person’s success isn't achieved at the expense or exclusion of the success of others…It’s not your way or my way; it’s a far better way, a better way.”
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