So much of our time is often filled with others. Whether it is the people in our lives or all the “other” things we want to do or feel we need to do. A part of us can start to feel guilty or even ashamed if we begin to pull back any amount of that energy for ourselves. Even though we may be hurting or in dire need of a break, the thought of caring for ourselves can feel selfish and self-centered. We may know rationally we are not much help to the world if we are sick and unhealthy, yet we hold onto the idea that we just need to push a little further and then we’ll have a chance to take care of ourselves.
If we are so important to so many people and so many situations, then how can we be of service if we can’t even care for our own needs?
There are many underlying psychological reasons why we forsake ourselves for others. Sometimes it is about control. We feel out of control in the context of our own lives and so we feel better if we can believe we are in control of others. A lack of self worth can push us to focus on others. We are unable to see ourselves as valuable if we do not constantly try to prove to the world that we are valuable.
In some situations we focus on others for selfish reasons. The very thing we tell ourselves we are not doing, being selfish, turns out to be exactly why we are so focused on others. We want them to do things for us. We have an unwritten agreement that says, “You owe me.” Maybe the most valuable thing we can do for others is to take care of ourselves so we are available for others when there is truly a need for support.
If human life is precious, then isn’t your life precious?
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