Well, we had a Christmas, of sorts. It was a very quiet one, subject to the state/local edict of no more than eight persons gathered, and if you're having visitors here, you'd be well advised to make sure they are local and not from one of the high infection areas.
It wasn't exactly a white Christmas, although it did snow a bit on the day of the Solstice, and a few tiny patches remainded on Christmas day... what we like to call "Designer Snow" around here.
Mind you, I'm quite OK with a quiet Christmas. Most of our Christmases when I was a kid were pretty quiet because my dad was pretty much a misanthrope.
I had to go to the supermarket today for assorted sundry items and took a little extra time to drive around and take pictures of various "stuff" simply because I could, and because I have always rather enjoyed the quiet that comes in those in-between days between Christmas and January 2nd.
Hummingbird enjoying a COLD drink...
Searching for my Lost Motivation
Now I am sitting here at one in the aye-em, tapping away at the keyboard while searching for my lost motivation.
If there's one thing I have experienced as a "side effect" of this whole Covid circus it's a subtle subtext of "meh" around most things; a deep sensation of indifference in most situations.
I think what made me tired — and has been making me tired for some months — is this reality that I am working more than usual and the result if fewer/less results than usual. After a while of dealing with diminishing returns, you find yourself bumping into a wall, of sorts.
I remember way back in the when, when I was a technical writer in the IT field, right as the whole idea of "working by email" and "global outsourcing" was becoming a thing.
The pond in winter
As an independent contractor, I watched my income go from $30/hr to $25/hr to $20/hr... and eventually I just ended up throwing in the towel around $12/hr because my competition had become people with English degrees from British and American universities who were living in places where $600 a month was considered a "good salary." And my rent was $750...
Was I still working and earning "something?" Absolutely! the main experience was that it was demotivating to watch a skill I'd busted my butt to develop become... worthless.
I'm starting to feel a little bit like that, right now...
What it all brings to mind is the (sad?) reality that we pretty much all do things contingent on a reward. Sometimes, that reward can be intangible... but intangible rewards don't pay the rent!
Winter branches
I certainly enjoy things like blogging and creating art, but like a great many people in this country (and others) I can less and less afford to spend time with things that don't involve monetary compensation of some substance.
It's all a matter of priorities.
Had one of my long message "conversations" with one of my cousins back in Denmark, earlier in the week... as always, it involved (American) politics and a fair bit of humor on account of same... but there's enough material there for an entire (undoubtedly inflammatory) post by itself!
And with that, I am going to head off to bed. Thanks for reading my incoherent ramblings, and have a great rest of your weekend!
How about YOU? How was your Christmas? How's your motivation level, in the era of Covid? Comments, feedback and other interaction is invited and welcomed! Because — after all — SOCIAL content is about interacting, right? Leave a comment — share your experiences — be part of the conversation!
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Created at 20201227 01:40 PST
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