Though I must confess to recent fantasies of dispatching the numbskull who decreed that all plastic bottles in Europe must now have tethered caps, I fear my constitution is far too feeble for murder. I’ve read Crime and Punishment and besides, I was educated by nuns, who drilled into me the sacred duty to constantly examine my conscience. Examine it? Sure I’m a slave to it! And to quote Hamlet, ‘Thus conscience doth make cowards of us all.”
So no, I’ve not killed anyone...yet. Though after my stepmother died in my arms, I did acquire something of a reputation. Entirely undeserved, I assure you.
My reading tastes are decidedly lowbrow, detective novels and police procedurals, so I know a thing or two about murder and the commission thereof. My life’s purpose has so far eluded me, but perhaps it lies in ridding the world of those who presume to trample on our inalienable right to do as we bloody well please.
I’d begin with lawmakers, then move swiftly on to taxmen and their ilk, those whose professions seem to require that they hang their moral compass on the coat rack before clocking in. This I think, would justify my existence on this flat plane of ours. I’d consider it my gift to humanity. I am after all, generous to a fault, just like my father, who’d gladly give anyone your last penny. ‘Cast your bread upon the waters," he used to say, "and it will return to you a thousandfold." Those odds struck me as excellent, so I’ve always tossed money around like a man with no arms.
And should you find me a touch extreme, dear reader, I would contend that when the state insinuates itself so far into a citizen’s life that he can no longer enjoy his morning mocha without first hacking the top off his milk bottle with a scissors, well, the giddy end has been reached.
Rise up!
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Posted in response to galenkp's weekend experience
prompt asking ... What book are you reading this weekend and why? How do you justify your existence on planet earth, Have you ever killed another human being? Generous or selfish, which are you? and If you were asked to explain you life's purpose as you saw it what would the explanation look like
