Ha haa, I shall refrain from wrestling the hipster for his odd little friends. I eat Kale, but probably not enough to reach Popeye sorts of fetes of strenth. Classic Fiedler, thanks for that. I used to be a Bee Gees fan, but don't tell anyone.
As for biking, I found a 'free' garden hose, complete with big plastic reel on wheels during my late night ride. I had to hold it with one hand while riding in the dark. Dorky thing weighed a ton, and not exactly 'compact'. Took all my energy trying to just go straight. But hey, it was FREE!! We use a ton of garden hoses here on 'the acreage', and they're always blowing out and I'm always repairing them. So, any free hose is a good hose in the Book of Schteinn.