The problem of many is that, without realizing it, in their relationship with God, instead of growing up, by their ups and downs, they feel increasingly alienated from God.
"Abram was ninety-nine years old when the Lord appeared to him and said, 'I am the Almighty God; walk before me and be perfect. "Genesis 17: 1
Abraham began his relationship with God when he was seventy-five years old. Twenty-five years later, God tells him: Walk before me. It's as if your spouse told you that after twenty-five years of marriage. You would think: And what have we done all these years? It is as if God appeared to you now, and you will be decades in the Lord, and He would say to you: Walk before me and be perfect. That perfect word, in the original, is the word wholehearted or with all your heart. In other words, God is saying to Abraham: You've been twenty-five where I've been sharing your heart with someone else, with other things. Abraham was frustrated, complaining that he did not have a son, without realizing that the problem was not God, but that he had been walking with God for twenty-five years, but not with all his heart.
And God says: If you want this relationship to continue, at your ninety-nine years of age, you have to decide to walk with me with all my heart. What would be your reaction? Would you bother? Or would you accept that you are wrong? Abraham could claim and say: How do you say I have not served you with all my heart? You told me twenty-five years ago to leave my father's house and my family, and I left everything, I've walked through this desert and I still do not know where you're taking me, but I'm still here. Would that be your attitude?
What is your attitude when you approach the Lord? Do you remember the years you have served him? Or would you be willing to hear God tell you: You have been with me for twenty-five years, but your heart is still not all mine? Do you still have resentment for what God has not done? Do you have courage for what has not happened? Are you still looking for options? This happened thirteen years after Abraham had Ishmael, so, the day he laid down with the servant, God stopped him from speaking for thirteen years. There are people who go to church for thirteen years and God does not speak to them. And the question is: Does God really have your whole heart? Does your actions show it?
Relationships are fragile, and our faith, sometimes, too. There are problems, difficulties, and our relationships break down. Those who approach and love each other, we try to fix it, to amend it, but we despise the relationship like a broken rope, because a knot makes it not look perfect. We see the imperfect. But we want to see a straight, perfect line. We start with God, and we want our whole life with Him to be perfect; And, sometimes, when it is not like that, we blame God, because "God did not do", "God did not take me out", "God did not avoid daddy's death", "God did not avoid divorce".
Pass the problem and you come back together in relationship with God, but then, the ideal relationship that you wanted was the one that does not have a knot or imperfection. But a broken and amended rope, with a knot, is shorter, so it is better because the two ends are now closer than they had ever been. When you approach God, you are not as close as when you have persecuted him. God was saying to Abraham: You have an Ishmael, but you are closer; You have a knot, but you are closer.
He who persecutes God does not have a perfect life, he does not have a straight line; There are highs and there are casualties. And, the more knots there are in your life, the closer is your relationship with God. Marriage should not separate you; You want the marriage to have no knots, but marriage is not like that. The problem of many is that, when they cut off their marriage, they stopped persecuting, seeking to join again. The persecution of God is in the midst of your difficulties and problems; That is when you should look for him the most, when you will serve him the most, when you will pray the most. After all, that is what He does with you: The worse you behave, the more it seeks you, the more it persecutes you. Was not it what he did with Jacob? The moment he cheated on his father, he meets him. Another would leave him, leave him. Jacob is fleeing from his father's house, and God meets him and says: I want you to know that I will not leave you, until I do what I am going to do with you. He told him: This is not about whether you love me and you are looking for me, but that I promised your dad that I was going to do something with you, and whatever you do, I'm going to chase you.
When you do not understand what God is doing, keep looking for Him-not approaching you, but seeking Him. Keep going to church, keep praying, keep reading the Bible, remain devoted to God. Your relationship is not going to be perfect. In all relationships with God, there will be knots, but it is always searching. It may not look so nice, but after time, you will not feel farther from God, but closer. Do not fear that people see the knots of your relationship with God. Sometimes, you will question God, but come back and persecute him, come back and believe him, come back and look for him, come back and serve him with all your heart.
The saddest thing in a relationship is when you stop pursuing. But God has never stopped you from persecuting. Never. You can feel guilty, you may even have denied it, and God comes again and again and persecutes you. And the same question that God asks in Genesis is the one that still comes down from heaven and asks again: Adam, where are you?
