The Results
I completed Liber Astarte and was incredibly happy with how it worked out. I sent notes from it to my teacher and a couple of weeks later received a response. I went to an internet café to read his latest email. (I didn’t have internet at home in those days). He sounded distant, displeased and critical again, claiming that I’m a complete failure. I had about enough of him and figured he will probably be relived to see me go. That said, I could not help but be really upset and disappointed. I still had feelings for him after all.
After reading all he had to say I bought a bottle of wine, a bunch of roses, apple and a marker pen. I took a bus to the seaside and went to the end of a pier in a quiet harbour. It was one of my favourite spots to hang around. I called upon the quarters so that all the elements may bare witness to the act of magick I was about to perform. I took the apple and wrote on it a rhyme ‘Take away the love that harms, instead bring me one that’s fun!’ I said it out loud and I took a sip of wine from the bottle, before smashing it on the rocks. I threw roses into the sea as an offering to the spirits. It felt powerful, liberating and extremely satisfying. After this I consumed the apple, thanked the spirits and came back home.
In the evening I greeted Set with some port and fresh figs. I thanked him for the awesome time we had together and I asked for a favour: ‘Help me find a partner who is as great and lovely to me as you are, and with whom I can happily continue to praise you.’. Set responded to me with some casual remark, like ‘no problem’.
Soon after that I began networking on myspace.com (it was long time ago!) and came across Anton. We shared an interest in film making and magick and we began talking to each other online. I wasn’t thinking of them in terms of relationship even though we immediately gelled with each other. I was excited to make friends in England before moving there to study. Then, one day Anton sent me a photograph of a painting they did during of full sun eclipse in 1999. To my surprise the painting portrayed a figure of Set holding the Black Sun in his hand. Frankly, I didn’t know what to say. I was astonished.
A month later Anton and I met up for the first time and after an intensely hot and romantic weekend, they offered to let me move in with them for the summer. It was something I would have never considered doing in the past. Moving in with a person I only know for a few days seemed crazy but I knew I had to go for it. It was supposed to be just for a couple of months until I find student accommodation for myself. We have lived together ever since, we got engaged a year later and married in 2014. Our life together is an awesome adventure, we are truly happy and able to explore each other in a spirit of love, mutual respect and fun. We are also very happy to honour Set by bringing him Port and figs every so often.