Sting’s performance at the American Music Awards on Monday night was a reassuring sign for post-middle-aged men everywhere: maybe we can turn back the clocks of time and reclaim our youth. Sting’s new album, 57th & 9th attempts to take those steps back musically as well. In Rolling Stone’s review, it was proclaimed a “no lute zone.” Guitars were said to return. This was supposed to be a “return to form” for Sting.
So why doesn’t 57th & 9th resonate like it should? Sting obviously knows a thing about rock music – the dude was the most important person in The Police. However, it seems after 11-straight mopey records (you must include his “winter album” If On A Winter’s Night), sadness, emptiness, and despair just can’t escape his heavy hand. This album, for its attempts at being a throwback to “De Do Do Do, De Da Da Da” and “Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic,” is just one gigantic bummer, song after song.
“I Can’t Stop Thinking About You” is the depressing start. Just look at these lyrics:
White page, an empty field of snow
My room is 25 below
This cold man chasing ghosts
A road lies underneath the buried posts
Dogs search the under forest
We scour the empty streets
The fact remains until we find you
Our lives are incomplete
It only goes downhill from there. Song two, “50,000” is a tribute to deceased rockers who left the earth early in the last couple of years. In case you couldn’t insinuate it in the lyrics, Sting reminds us: “Still believing that old lie, the one that your own face betrays/Rock Stars don’t ever die, they only fade away.”
Ready to pull a Kanye yet? Don’t, because Sting has given up on mankind by track three, “One Fine Day:.”
Dear leaders, please do something quick,
Time is up, the planet’s sick.
But hey, we’ll all be grateful,
One fine day?
Don’t worry. There’s more death. More sadness. More disappointment. But no disappointment will be bigger than the Sting fans who appreciated his detours and forays into adult-contemporary music. Yes, it’s expected of a man Sting’s age (he is 65) to sing about growing old, feeling weary. But Neil Young, Tom Waits, Jackson Browne… these guys aren’t trying to sonically hold onto their past. Paul Simon made one of the best albums of the year, but he wasn’t trying to sound like “You Could Call Me Al” all over again.
Will you listen to 57th & 9th repeatedly? Perhaps. Parts are extremely catchy and the sound will have you hearkening for the old days. But when you settle down and listen to the lyrics, you’ll be wishing the album sounded a little more like Ten Summoner’s Tales, The Soul Cages, or even 2013’s The Last Ship.
