I see where you are coming from and I can understand it so well.

I think that hardships can change you. The kind of hardships that are like a storm for your soul. You know those people who at a certain point, something clicked for them and they were never the same again? I feel this might be a possibility for all of us. The graves we have been digging for the better version of ourselves we did not believe in. I never knew how strong I can be until life brought me to my knees. I did not know my heart can still heal after having a painful heartbreak. After a while, I can look upon the older me...and somehow that makes me dig and rediscover myself. It is odd. You reflect on the old you and this makes you get to the new-hidden version of yourself.

Change is good. I think it is so easy to get into a rut. And do what you always did. No matter if it implies pain or pleasure.

People suffer in silence. While they post stories , reels and shorts. I know it. Because just like everybody else I am human.

But I think that it is worth sitting with your own pain, boredom, existential dread. Because it tells a story. About who you forgot to be. And just like in the fog....it takes extra awareness to rediscover yourself.

I am in a better place. I now compare myself to the one I was yesterday. It is better. I won't lie and pretend I am super completely healed. I am on the journey. But aren't we all?

I suprised myself the other days when an idea about possibly having a family one day, a life where Home feels like a place I would like to have with someone, popped into my mind. I often saw myself alone. I take it as a good sign, that I am healing emotionally. I think the Universe will always give us what we need in order to be better. I think I needed all I had been through in order to get to this version of me now, who speaks to you and to myself in the same time. Odd. Such is life.
Stay strong, we are all on a journey.