In my country where females are expected to follow a particular lifestyle or traditional norm as it's what is expected of a female child.
In Nigeria, where conformity is valued, there are three friends named Eva, Mercy, and Princess, they stand out like a rainbow in a monochrome world. They loved art, poetry, football, and fashion, and they expressed themselves through vibrant clothes and hairstyles.
Eva who acts strange among these three is often seen as a weirdo even her classmates and some teachers mock her, calling her "weird" and "strange." They didn't understand why she couldn't just fit in and be like everyone else.
My mom would always say queen, stay away from these girls, don't make them your friend and I don't like their behavior. I nodded my head in affirmation but deep down I wanted to be their friend but too afraid to be judged I kept admiring them from afar.
Back to them, Mercy was a little different she loved football a lot and often acted like a boy never to be seen in a group of girls but boys except her friends Eva and Princess. Mercy dared to dream big. She loved football, and her passion and talent earned her a spot on the boys' team.
The boys will be like have you seen Mercy playing football you won't help but fall in love with her.
As for the Princess, she is just a crazy fashionista, I do see her dress sense as awkward and outdated but it all makes sense now to me.
One day, Eva's art teacher, Mrs. James assigned a project that allowed Eva to showcase her unique talent. Eva created a stunning piece that reflected her individuality, but the classmates, ridiculed it, saying it was "ugly" and "didn't make sense."
Those cruel words stung, and Eva felt like hiding her true self. But her mother an understanding mother who doesn't discriminate and her principal who loves kids who are different intervened, praising Eva's creativity and encouraging her to embrace her differences. The principal shared her own story of being judged for her unconventional style, and how it fueled her passion for art.
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From that day, Eva realized she wasn't alone, and that being different was what made her special. With newfound confidence, she continued to express herself authentically, inspiring others to do the same, she no longer shy from people or cares about what people say to her.
As l listened to Eva's story, I felt inspired to lose and be myself.
May I remind you that my mom has warned me to stay away from them which I obeyed but I liked them so much. Now listening to their stories of how they made it against all odds, I wish I made them friends early.
So I asked Mercy and Princess to tell me their own story about being different and people's inaction and actions toward them.
Mercy said her own was difficult for people to accept. People often see her as a lesbian because she is always acting as a tomboy. When she is on the field playing football with the boys, not everyone is happy about it. Some parents and teammates will be whispering among themselves, saying Mercy is "too aggressive" and "too competitive" for a girl. They claimed she was "acting like a man" and didn't belong on the field. Mercy says she tried to ignore the criticism, but it was hard sometimes to overlook. She was constantly compared to her male teammates, and her mistakes were magnified. She felt like she had to work twice as hard to prove herself.
But Mercy I asked how did you push forward? Amidst all the comparison and taunt. She smiled and said to her coach.
Mercy says her coach was her strength, she can't forget one day after a friendly match with another school, which they lost. Everybody was throwing blame at her including some of her teammates (boys). She couldn't tolerate it anymore, she lashed out at them, giving them back the energy they had been giving her and fled to cry in a corner. but her coach came to meet her and console her. According to Mercy, she says her coach is a wise and forward-thinking woman, so she took her to her office sat her down, and said, "Mercy, your strength and determination are assets, not weaknesses. Don't let anyone define what it means to be a woman on the field. You play with heart and skill, and that's all that matters." Mercy said something sparkled inside of her that was a determination not to care but to focus on being the best. Another thing that gave her hope was not all her teammates that disliked her, in fac t, most of them who truly understood the game appreciated her unique contributions.
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After Mercy was done with her story, I turned to Princess to fill me in on how she was able to make people accept her and her awkward dress. She just turned with a grumpy face, she thought that her dress was not awkward but unique. I laughed cause she was right
Princess says Growing up, she has always had a different taste when it comes to fashion. According to her, her curves didn't fit the mold of the industry's standard beauty ideal. But she loved fashion, and she knew she deserved to feel beautiful too.
She loves to look flawless in anything she wears. She just doesn't like following trends, she has always loved to be the center of attraction and attention. So, she took matters into her own hands. She started experimenting with different styles by using pieces of materials she found at her aunt's tailoring shop, finding ways to accentuate her curves and celebrate her uniqueness.
She embraced her love for bright colors, bold patterns, and statement pieces.
She started wearing her clothes which I found not beautiful then. Gradually people started to accept her, and she started sketching beautiful styles on her own today Princess owns a big fashion company, and she now works with designers to create exclusive clothing lines. She told me the main reason why she decided to stand out was her body size, which people usually mock her by calling her Fatima, orobo, and other silly names. In her words:'' My fashion journey wasn't just about clothes – it was about redefining beauty standards and empowering women to love themselves, no matter their shape or size''. And I learned that true beauty comes from within, and that fashion can be a powerful tool for self-expression and self-love. While Mercy is a footballer and Eva become one of the best artists when it comes to painting and drawing beautiful artwork.
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Little by little people started appreciating Eva's unique perspective, they learned that conformity was not the only way to belong. Eva's, mercy and princess courage to be different created a ripple effect, celebrating individuality and transforming the community where we all grow up into a vibrant, inclusive space.
Everybody now celebrates Mercy's achievement. I realized that strength and competitiveness come in different forms regards of gender.
Mercy continued to play with passion and pride, inspiring other girls to join the team and challenging traditional gender norms. Most girls today have joined Mercy and they are doing well.
Well, as for me, I wish I hadn't listened to Mom and pursued my dream of becoming a model or an actress. Mom who was a choir mistress then always tells me, you want to be a model so you will be wearing pants and appear on television to disgrace your family.
She said that actresses don't get married. She was able to convince me to go for something which I did. Although am doing well for myself, a part of me still wishes I took a bold step like Mercy, Eva, and Princess. It sometimes makes me unhappy but life goes on
Thank you for reading
Hope I tried today