Long ago, before the global spread of social media, friendship operated differently from how it did now. Back then talking to friend meant going over their house, meeting them in close, playing games in the evening or during whatever outdoor activity that comes to mind for the day. One thing remained constant though, friendship was primarily centered on "physical contact". Friends were people we could see face to face, touch and hear up close whether it was at home, in school environment, the neighborhood or anywhere close and whenever they moved out of our vicinity, best believe that friendship is bound to deteriorate unless both party find a way to make it work regardless of the distance. Right now, the whole concept of friendship has evolved down to the fundamental level. You can wake up on a random Monday morning and the first person you talk to is someone in a completely different continent sharing personal information and bonding through a smartphone.
That is the up side to having Friends online. You might know their favorite meal, hobbies, where they work, their fears and relationship but still don't even know what they really look like up close besides what you see on pictures or through a video call. The online space have brought people who live in different worlds together making them feel like super close regardless of the distance. However, despite the numerous privileges associated with online friendships, it also comes with questions quite difficult to answer. Are we really building relevant relationships or just getting comfortable with people we might never meet because they exist on my devices.
Since the rise of social media, gaming communities or whatever means people communicate online, it has now become possible for people who share similar interests to meet express themselves. Someone who struggles to fit in in the physical environment can easily discover an online community where they easily be themselves and just enjoy a good time without knowing anybody there. There is just something extremely comforting to know that there are just people to talk to when you going through a whirlpool of emotions by just simply stretching your hand for your phone. To a lot of folks some of the closest people in their lives are people they met online and in most cases the distance even makes it easier to communicate with them freely because we are not worried about being judged or how it'll even affect us.
Having online friends still have its own shortcomings though. For starters most people you meet on the online space are usually fakers and only show you the version of themselves they want you to see while hiding who they truly are. I remember being friends with someone on Facebook for over 9 months during the covid 19 period. Online she was the sweetest person I had ever known and this made it easy for me to express myself without being judged by her. After months of endless talking, phone and video calls we decided it was time to take the friendship to the physical space since we lived in the same city. Our first encounter was great and because of that, we decided to make it a frequent activity but after a couple playdates, everything just died. This was because she was just a different person from what she showed and knowing I could not cope with what I saw, I slowly withdraw from her ending things for both our sakes.
A lot of people lie about their age, location, intentions and even gender. A lot of people can go as far as creating fake accounts just to manipulate others, weasel their way into people's private lives going as far as scamming them of their belongings. Imagine bonding with someone for a very long time only to discover later on that the entire friendship was one big lie.
As a teenager I had my first girlfriend on 2go her name was Sandra. We talked every single day with plans to meet up one day until I lost contact with her for reasons I can't even remember. So imagine the shock I got last year when I found out that Sandra did not even exist and the entire relationship was a prank from two of my classmates.
Even with the downside that comes with having online friends, one cannot also ignore it's benefits. I belief that a balance between both the physical and the online will the best approach towards handling this topic. There are incredible opportunities online but because of this one should not completely focus their attention online ignoring real face to face experiences.
Having friends online are not the solution to true lonliness nor will it lead to the destruction of humanity. It is just a sign that times are changing so we just need to adapt to them while still maintaining our important values. Make friends online but don't forget to still interact to the friends who still need our presence.
Ps: All images are mine