I was a chronic stammerer when I was a kid. It was so severe that I found it difficult to pronounce the simplest word like "daddy". I wouldn't say convincingly that my parents used to pray for the rectification of the distortions in my speech but I know for sure they wished for my fluency.
One of the days my dad had his meal in our dinning room, I had five naira which I decided to buy my dad a biscuit. I bought the biscuit and I knew my dad would be happy to receive it. On getting to the table, I stood over five minutes trying so hard to say "daddy", my father understood what was happening but he kept looking at me and eating intermittently. He saw the biscuit in my hand and the next minute I heard him ask what the problem was with a stern voice and my voice came up shouting "daddy". That was the day I stopped stammering till date.
My parents used to tell me of the many opportunities I'd miss if I don't train myself to speak without stammering. Inasmuch as we knew that it came naturally and maybe some neurological conditions, they made it clear that I also have the power to speak and have authority over situations in my life.
Apart from the above, there are so many things my parents have told me and cautioned me about without the use of cane and they've formed principles that have worked overtime. In fact, some of the things they used a cane to caution me about had long been forgotten because they may not have believed what I said or they didn't just want to listen. But the times they discussed an issue with me and I admitted its commission, I realized the corrections formed a part of me and I lived with it, hitherto.
It's never a bad idea to use the cane in disciplining a child but sometimes the child needs to be given a clear perspective of life in a more calm and understanding manner. As much as this would create fear in the child, there'll definitely be a bond between the child and his parents because he has been heard too. It'll be easy for him to share his fears with his parents without fear of bruises.
I realized that most of the actions certain people exhibit is out of strictness from their parents or older people who coerce them. I can concretely say that there's a difference between being strict and being a disciplinarian. When the shackles of strictness is let loose, the child explores everything he sees because the side effects of his actions were not internalized in him which is the duty of discipline. Discipline follows a being even in the absence of the parents because he wouldn't want to damage his integrity that has been admired by many and has certainly birthed positive results.
Like I'll always say, social media is one platform that should curb promiscuity considering how the world has been reduced to a clan or even a family but we still have people who dare us with questions and sometimes I wonder if it's lack of discipline or misplaced maturity. I know the idea of living a moral life is gradually dwindling but the fact that we hope to bring children into the world should be enough to make ourselves role models to them because definitely there are habits we detest and wouldn't want our children to indulge in them but it should start with us.
