"Oh God! I've forgotten what I ought to say." I thought inwardly, "I am done for.".
"Young lady, we haven't got all day."
My supervisor, Mr Haruna barked at me, snatching me back to reality. I was inside the school hall with him and two other supervisors who were waiting for me to commence the defending of my project. Mr Haruna was a short bald man, a pot belly and a rotten attitude. I almost wept the day I discovered he was going to be my supervisor. He had a terrible attitude to match his looks. I didn't like him, he was wicked and he had a terrible fashion sense. He always wore a shirt tucked into different colours of trousers depending on his mood for the day.
"I'm sorry, sir."
I gulped and and crossed my hands behind me. My leg was already shaking and my high heels didn't help matters too. I felt my toes getting stiff and slipping in my heels from sweat.
I took in the expression on the faces of the supervisors, and it was obvious they weren't going to condone a waste of their time.
"So, let's have it, miss or would you rather reschedule your defense?"
Mrs Also the only female among them asked. She was smartly dressed in a yellow jumpsuit, her hair was tied back in a neat bun, and on her feet were black open toed heels. She had an oval-shaped face with a defining jaw and beautiful blue eyes. She was beautiful but she has a reputation among students for being strict. She was black skinned and she had a few spots on her hands and legs, probably from mosquito bites as a child. I wouldn't call her tall, she was of average height and she had flesh in all the right places.
"No, ma'am, I won't reschedule."
"Okay, go on."
Mr Ajanlekoko the third supervisor said smiling like he was chewing on stone while talking. I could almost swear I heard him crushing something in his mouth with his teeth. Mr Ajanlekoko wasn't the sort of man you would remember seeing, he was plain looking and his only distinctive feature was his unusually big nose which seemed to inflate every time he was angry, and it was frequent, i tell you.
If I don't defend my project today, I just might spend another extra year in school and it's not something I can afford. I took time to research the topic I was given very well, and I made sure it was error free. I had studied it so much I could almost recite everything in there word for word. So, what's the problem? I was nervous. I could literally feel butterflies in my tummy. I had suddenly lost the ability to talk, and it won't end well. If only I had listened to Simone, she predicted this a long time ago.
"Who would have thought you could be this fun? You always had this gloomy, keep your distance look on your face whenever we were in class."
Simone, my course mate commented on our trip to the mall sometime ago. Simone was my level mate and we didn't speak to each other throughout the four years we had lectures together. We became friends after we each had to return for an extra year. The circumstances bonded us, and we've been tight since.
"Really? You haven't even met the fun part of me yet. You better hang tight." I replied smiling back at her.
"Why though?"
"Why what?" I asked, a smile still plastered on my face.
"Why do you keep your distance with everybody? No one is an island you know?"
Sighing, I paused in front of the apple section and put two inside the shopping basket in my hand.
"I don't keep my distance, I just get nervous around too many people. I only have a small circle of friends and we vibe well. I don't know how to relate with people, i get nervous, I don't usually know what to say, so I just keep my distance. I hate being rejected by anyone for any reason and thats why I don't go where I'm not invited."
"If you ask me, I think you better start learning how to be social, you just might need it one day. You have to overcome the feeling of nervousness, it's not going to help you."
"I'll worry about that when the time comes."
"Okay, whatever you say. Let me just give you a valuable tip in case you need it. Whenever you are talking to people, always remember that they are human beings like you, and they can't devour you. The worst thing that could happen is rejection, and it's not a big deal. Everyone has had rejection at some point in their livea*
"Sure, I'll put your tip to good use."
I replied noncommittally staring lustfully at a nonstick pan I've been dying to buy for some time. I sighed and moved on to another section.
Why didn't I just listen?"
"It appears we will have to reschedule your defense, you have wasted our time."
Mr Haruna announced, standing up from his seat with the other supervisors.
Oh no! I can see my convocation floating away and another extra year, holsimg a ring to propose to me again. No, my future depends on it. What's the worst that could happen right? They are human beings like me.
I rubbed my sweaty palms together, my heart beating loudly against my chest like it was fighting to come out. I took several deep breaths and decided it was now or later. And by later, I mean the following year.
"Please, don't go, I shouted. I'm ready now."
They exchange glances and sit back in their seats.
Here goes nothing, I drifted away at that moment to the time when I was preparing for my defense. It was only me in the room from that point and I started my defense the way I used to revise.
I explained the topic thoroughly, backed it up with confirmed facts and even added my own propounded theories.
By the time I was done, my supervisors were beaming and nodding their heads repeatedly.
"That's just beautiful I must say."
Mrs. Alao praised me, grinning.
Next came the questions and I answered everything without missing a beat. I was even asked trick questions to confirm if I knew what I was saying, but I saw right through it and gave the correct answers.
"I'm impressed, your defense has proven that there's still hope for the younger generation. I know most of your coursemates paid to have their projects done for them, it's as clear as day that you did your research by yourself and thoroughly too."
I beamed at Mr. Haruna's praise and I almost exploded with joy. I wasn't expecting that surely.
"Thank you, sir."
"I don't have much to say, my colleagues have said it all, you did a phenomenal job." Mr Ajanlekoko said smiling in a way that showed part of his lower teeth and it was a sore sight i tell you.
I had an A in my project and that was the first incident that propelled me towards working on my social skills. I still get nervous around many people, but I'm learning to cope and thankfully, I'm improving.
All you have to do to overcome nervousness is to take charge, and I sure have been since then.
