I killed my first houseplant the other day.
I’ve never had that happen before.
Didn’t give him enough water and now Andy's dead and gone off to houseplant heaven.
He was a good houseplant.
I probably should have given him a proper burial out in the compost pile, but I was feeling lazy and so I just threw him in the trash can.
I am not a good houseplant owner.
I will go to houseplant owner hell when I die.
Bandcamp.com/discover/electronic in my head.
Slay, as all the rizz kids say these days.
Silly rizztards.
It's fine.
Everything's on fire inside my mind but it's fine.
Went to the pharmacy to get more of the little white pills that keep me from killing myself, but they told me I will have to wait another week before my insurance will pay their fair share of the drug deal.
That’s a first for me.
I’ve never had that happen before.
I should probably give my pistol to a more mentally stable friend to hang onto while my brain goes on an unmedicated bender.
Wait, do I even have any friends?
Nope.
Bummer.
Should I even own a pistol?
Absolutely not.
Don’t tell my mom I own a pistol.
If I'd owned a pistol that night in January 2019 when I made my attempt, I wouldn't be here today.
Intentional overdose.
Came to in the bathtub.
Beer cans empty pill bottles and a bloody utility knife.
An arm's length away from eternity, said the ER doctor.
Nobody really cares, though.
Born alone, died alone.
And in between, a lifetime of sadness happiness suffering and ecstasy.
Sidetracked.
Blindsided.
As I was on my way out, she was on her way in.
Back from her lunch break, I suppose.
Words fail me.
That’s how attractive she is.
My brain shuts down when I see her.
You know what it's like, right?
Falling so hard for someone that you can hardly talk?
I know for sure now that she doesn't think I'm creepy, even though I'm a good deal older than her.
I just can't tell if she's flirting or being friendly.
It's always tricky with coworkers.
It's more than the mere risk of rejection - it's the added risk of feeling really awkward around someone you have to see several days a week.
But bloody hell, I think this woman is worth the risk.
April is the month I will finally find the balls to ask her out.
I don't care if she says no.
Life is short.
Call in sick.
Quit your job.
Do whatever makes you happy.
Don't ever grow up.
Be a Toys 'R' Us kid.
That's the best way to live life.
In fifty years I'll be dead and none of this will matter.
Tired of typing.
It's too long, anyways.
Goodbye for now.
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