Image created with bing creator
If I had started this article with how I look, which is the combo of my parent's appearance, then it would have been a long essay because there are so many things I would have loved to share with you all.
Just yesterday, a friend of mine gave birth to a bouncing baby boy that looks so adorable. I used the adjective "beautiful and sweet" because his handsomeness has huge similarities with the alluring beauty of a baby girl.
Looking at the newborn, it was so obvious he took after his mom's resemblance that I didn't see any single trace of his dad. Maybe as he grows older he will take the form of his father. So for no reason, we began talking about how the importance of the father being around all the time will make the newborn look more like him.
There's this superstitious belief then that we (mom, aunt, and grandma) used to believe that when a pregnant woman stays so close to a particular person that's her favorite the baby takes their resemblance/appearance. It happened to my aunt and sometimes I think the father of the child is my uncle because they have this closeness/bond.
We kept arguing until someone else said it should be the gene, not some superstitious belief, well I couldn't argue further but I believe that there's psychology behind that superstitious belief regarding my thoughts. So what are your thoughts about that?
Most certainly, it's the genes of both parents that would determine the behavior pattern of the children but come to think of it, why do some children won't take the parent's gene instead they take from the paternal and maternal gene?
I'm sure you must have come across this situation and how did your mind absorb the thoughts of that?
Also, some people might call it reincarnation and it sounds absurd but haven't you heard about it?
'Oh she behaves just like great grandma'
'He coughs, sneezes, and farts at the same time that's how grandpa does'
And when this scenario is repeated countless times by that baby or that child, uncles, aunts, and close relatives greet the child and say welcome back! I don't know if you can relate to what I am saying but in the southern eastern part of Nigeria practically the Igbos, it's so common! I don't know about other tribes but you can tell me if you have such occurrences happening anything you can recall.
Image created with bing creator
All this time boils down to this question, tell us one trait or characteristic you got from your father, and then one that you got from your mother.
One trait that I got from my father is the disciplinary attitude. My dad has always been this soldier-like figure in the house and no one dares to mess up or behave stupidly at home. I took after him on this and I got to know when I have exhibited this characteristic several times. I'm the type of a person who would see something bad happening to someone and keep quiet about it and at the same time I am that person who wouldn't watch a child misbehave or get spoiled under my care.
I have carried this attitude to my apartment where I live and trust me sometimes it's better off to stay on my own and mind my business but at the same time I can't watch my roommates misbehave and I keep quiet. I'm sure they would beat me up someday lol. In the environment I live in I know how many times I have had to scold kids that are not mine just because they misbehave or use curse words to their fellow, oh, and smacking them isn't exempted but I rarely exhibit that part.
One trait that I got from my mother is her strength in terms of both hard work and taking care of the home. Sometimes I beg her to rest even if it's for two days since she's not working for someone but she won't listen.
She's never tired of waking up at 5:00 am to go to the market to get items for her store and her strength is where I got it from. She's barely tired!
I remembered a scenario when my brother's wife 'Allison' came to Nigeria and how I used to go to different markets in a day just to assemble all the items on the list. In a day, I went to Oniru Market, Balogun Market, Idumota Market, Ikeja Market, and Trade Fair Market and when I take those items home I will still arrange them in the cupboard.
Sometimes, I used to wonder if I am a Wonder Woman lol because such strength is unique and special to me. Having this trait from my mom makes me happy because I know that I can do anything that I set out to do and accomplish it in a blink.
How has this helped you in life?
It has helped me in so many ways, most especially the trait of my mother which is strength! I know how many times I have been in a messy situation like that of depression when no one was around me for a good three days I had suicidal thoughts but no one knew. I had to fight for myself and with strength, I was able to dabble out of that weakening situation that I was into.
Also, the situation of the market that I explained above is another area that has helped me so much.
Speaking of my father's traits that I inherited, they have helped shape my life in the aspect of morals, in the aspect of disciplining myself, in the aspect of controlling unwanted desires, and so forth.
Is this something you enjoy and would love to pass on to your kids?
Yes of course!
I enjoy it most of the time but sometimes I feel like it needs to be adjusted a little bit, not entirely. The reason is because I will love my kids to live their lives not fully dictated by me but that's when they get to a certain phase and age.
In addition, the father you choose for your children plays a role too in their lives except, or hopefully, my kids took over my traits completely which is seemingly impossible.
This is a response to the #hivelearners word of the week episode two - #hl-exclusive & #hl-w104e1.
💗
