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Sent: 7:32 am
Subject: Go wrong too long in Koh Rong PART ONE: The shit ship.
The boat was about forty five minutes late, which in Cambodia is on time. There were, approximately two passengers for every life jacket. I think this was done purposely, for the entertainment value of the crew, watching the fight break out as the boat goes down. Die laughing. Why not? Just to add to it all, the narrow walk way was blocked with fold out chairs to squeeze more passengers in and probably add to the crews entertainment in the case of an emergency. I stealthily slid out the back and sat outside next to the big diesel engine which was held in place by an ancient strop and a ratchet that was rat shit. The steel of the ratchet was rusted so thin that I kept giving it the odd glance, thinking 'this could go any minute and if it does, the whiplash will peel the skin off my face'.
Are you having your dinner? Good. The toilet was the most amazing sight. I took a photo of it. I will see if I can upload it. Basically the floor, the walls and even THE CEILING were covered in shit. Now due to the fact that I didn't see any elephants on the boat doing 'dirty protests', my only explanation is that the toilet exploded. Boom! Oh shit! You may want to put your fork down for a second. On closer inspection you could see that it was dried and had been there for a while. The conversation between the crew must have been 'Bog's blown up again'. 'Well don't look at me, I'm not cleaning it. I'm in charge of hiding the life jackets'. ''Ah, fuck it, the flies will polish it off within a couple of weeks and it's only the passengers who use it, anyway. Entertainment boys, entertainment'. Much to the disappointment of the crew, no one drowned and no one used the toilet.
Koh Rong island is, well................. another story.
