Ooh I love this "rant" - so many many tangents to pick up.
I'll start with an "ooh I need to read this" - Lionel Shriver 's The Movement of the Body Through Space ("....an older man who decides to take up running... all he wants to talk about are his runs, and he predictably expects a round of applause after every lap. Much to the chagrin of his wife who, albeit a lifelong runner, has never bought into the trend of running. Sort of ran before it was cool type.")
My kind of author/book:

It pokes great fun at people taking themselves too seriously, and also at how eagerly we latch on to any and every movement, idea or trend in an attempt to define ourselves.

My sister was an addict - running marathons, even at age 61. Suddenly she is dead. Ok, it took several months of horrific pain and struggle (Stage 4 stomach cancer) before she went down at age 62. Even bedridden, she would try to get up and move around. Ever see dogs running in their sleep? She was kinda like that....

Me, I've never been a runner. Bad knees. "Growing pains," doc said when I was 12, but I never outgrew them. Walking will suffice! Running, only in my dreams...