When it comes to relationships and marriage, everyone has different things to say about both the good and bad sides of it.
Marriage no longer lasts like it did during our mothers’ time because nowadays, everyone is claiming their rights, and no one wants to be calm for the other.
In fact, it has gotten to the extent that some men do not want to get married. They see marriage as some sort of cage that takes away their freedom and right to enjoy life as they see fit. Marriage seems to be a burden where they need to be the sole provider and, in the end, have less to take care of themselves. But it would have been better if that were all, because there is still more to being married.
In-Law Pandemic
There are some men who have no peace in their marriages because of their in-laws. It is one demand after another, and at some point, it can become suffocating for the man. This sometimes leads to a broken home, especially if the wife does not call her family to order or the man is not man enough to say no.
A friend of mine once shared with me how his girlfriend’s mother asked him for a sub, and he asked her which network she wanted. She replied, saying it was not airtime she wanted but a DStv subscription. For a guy who was still struggling to make ends meet, he did not know what to tell her. He just told her he would get back to her, and he kept ignoring her calls.
Some guys would have sent the money because they do not know how to say no, or they feel she is their future mother-in-law and they do not want to look bad in front of her. But I say, once you start it, you can never finish paying them. It is okay to give them things once in a while, but asking for them is a red flag because the requests never seem to end.
Some in-laws also try to dominate their children's relationships and marriages, and this is another big red flag. Stay away from your son's marriage, and when your daughter gets married, bear in mind that she is no longer yours to command. She is building a new family, and you need to respect the boundaries of her marriage. She and her husband will have decisions to make together, and you should not expect her to seek your permission for every decision she makes in her new home.
source
I am not saying in-laws are bad, because I understand that family is important, and there is nothing wrong with helping our families when we can. However, there should be boundaries that in-laws must not cross. Getting married does not mean abandoning your parents or cutting ties with your family, but it also does not mean allowing your family to interfere in your marriage or make demands that put unnecessary pressure on your spouse.
There is a difference between supporting your married children and trying to control their homes. There is also a difference between asking for help when you genuinely need it and making someone feel obligated to provide for you simply because they are married to your child. These are the boundaries I am talking about.
Just call me Burl.
I am a professional gamer, motivational speaker and a crypto enthusiast
Discord: burlarj
Twitter id: burlarj1
Telegram: burlarj
God exists, I am a living testimony
Giving up is not an option, every hustler has a payday
Don't wish for it, Make it happen
Only Love can heal a broken Heart