Hello fellow Steemians!
I'm Bristena and I'm super excited to join this emerging platform of writers and free thinkers.
It's been a month since Steemit was recommended to me, and this month has honestly been one of the best so far.
I have been contemplating the possibilities and oh, dear, I am in existential awe...
Of course, I'm not expecting an overnight success. I'm willing to put in a lot of work. I have had enough online "failures" which hopefully taught me that success comes with the right mixture of talent and perspiration, as the good old quote says.
Writing is my greatest passion, my soul's highest calling. I've been writing short stories, poems, diaries, essays and random scribbles ever since I know myself.
(my 3-year-old self at my grandad's old-fashioned typewriter)
Writing was always there, as a life-saver at times of acute depression or as a sweet dessert after a copious romantic meal.
I like to view writing as my creative, therapeutical and spiritual practice. But, funnily enough, I never took it as a serious vocation until last year.
How did that happen? Well, I had to go through some interesting twists and turns to reach the point of remembering who I really am, deep down in my innermost essence (well, at least what I have discovered so far!)
4 years and a half ago I moved from my home country (Romania, Eastern Europe) to London, U.K. to pursue a law degree.
That didn't last very long. An illustrious student in my hometown, I DROPPED OUT of my prestigious university after one year, much to my family's embarrassment and disappointment.
They thought: "She lost her mind!", but I knew I gained my soul.
Ever since I've been on a roller-coaster journey of discovering who I am, what my purpose is and what life really is about.
I began exploring anything that had to do with higher consciousness, alternative therapies, mind reprogramming, psychedelics, personal development, mysticism, astrology, yoga and meditation, new paradigm etc.
I became obsessed with the idea of healing and transformation, and I jumped at every invitation that would potentially grow, expand or enrich me.
From a heavily repressed, shy and introvert child, I grew into a colourful, spontaneous, expressive young woman with a vision and a mission.
(a picture from my fairy days...)
Yes, "I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one..." I see this vision taking shape underneath our very eyes, as more and more people wake up to a deeper truth of their being.
A truth beyond ideas of separation, control, fear. A truth of an intelligent, unified web of life, held together by love's vibrational glue...
(hugging the Earth at the East Side Gallery - Berlin Wall)
"The wound is the place where light enters you" - said the famous Rumi. I couldn't agree more.
I've been through hell, I've had some of my deepest fears come true and not only have I survived, but I thrived and I saw a greater me emerging. Phoenix is cliche, but it is so true.
Not only have I improved the quality of my life and my relationships with people, but I also feel so much love in my heart for life, God and the entire existence. I feel this on a daily basis now, save for the occasional triggers that point to my yet unresolved wounds, which I take time to sit with and find resolution for.
Some say I'm an old soul, for when they meet me, they see a wisdom beyond my years. Don't get me wrong - I'm young and prone to make mistakes! But I seem to possess a peculiar capacity to pick myself up, again and again, and keep going, no matter what.
It's only been 5 years since I had my first "awakening", but it feels like I've already lived a few lifetimes ever since.
It's a big dream, but I'm tired of complacency and smallness - I'm here, in this body, during these thrilling times on planet Earth, and I'm going to put in the necessary work to make the most of my time.
I see this as the perfect place to practice and manifest my passion for writing, to share my daily insights and inspirations and hopefully have a positive impact in my community. And if that brings me some money, it would be an amazing bonus!
I began writing my first "book" at the end of last summer, initially called "Confessions of a Law Dropout". The title doesn't appeal to me anymore, so I changed it to reflect more of what I truly am.
In the summer of 2016, I interviewed 21 experts in personal development, who shared their wisdom on how to overcome our fears and embody our greater potential.
In the last two years, I've written more than 80 poems. Some of them I've shared on Facebook, some of them I've kept to myself. Now is the time to bring them out into the open again.
It makes me so happy whenever someone really "gets" my poem, I wonder if you will too? Let me give you a taster, a poem that says a lot about me:
There is a magic inside me
A magic that grew in exponential stages
A magic I would often lose touch with,
Drowning in the abyss of the dark nights of my soul
This special feeling
Like a shimmering of light, of pure wonder at existence
Of gigantic, almost absurd trust in the workings of life
Has come back to me time and time again
Stronger, more vivid with each rebirth of my being
Phoenix is cliche but it is so true
Everything may fall apart
My ego could be shattered into a million pieces
I may lose face but never my hope
I may suffer from amnesia but I always remember
That this magic in me is alive and eternal
And there is forever love in my heart
With every poem I write
I whisper a prayer to the absolute
I make an offering to the divine
Acknowledging the impermanence of existence
I savour each moment like my last breath
And if I were to die today, I would be content
Because I've lived and loved and served
As fully as I ever could.
(traveller on the river of life - photo taken on the Lembongan Island, Bali Feb 2017)
So, if you like what you've read so far,
if you're interested to find out how a law dropout turned into a transformational life coach, who turned into a massage therapist and writer,
if you're looking for inspiration for your mind&soul,
and if you're ready to face your fear and find out how, then you've come to the right place.
Follow me and let's see where this journey takes us. Let me be your reflection...
I would really appreciate any feedback, suggestions and ways in which I can make the most of my time and engagement on this platform.
