So…..funny story. A few weeks ago I bought this really old hourglass from a pawnshop run by this really old Asian lady; you know, the one who looks like she is older than time itself with millions of wrinkles on her wrinkles and smoking more than a coal fired tar kettle. I have digressed, anyways I bought an hourglass that was really ornate, the glass was deformed with lots of little imperfections and ripples and had three spiraling snakes in helical fashion connecting the top and the bottom. I took it home and put it on my nightstand. It faintly looked as though the sand was always flowing very slowly but up from the bottom, which can’t be possible, but the glass was so foggy from age that it would be hard to tell. Either way it was ornate and beautiful. Well I was laying in bed relaxing and watching some Netflix and I realized it was time to get ready for our date. Well, I reached over about to get ready for our date this evening and went to retrieve my glasses from the nightstand and accidentally knocked off the old hour glass and the top popped off (I didn’t know it could do that) and a bunch of the sand came tumbling out of it. But the weirdest part was that the world came incredibly quiet. Netflix stopped. The leaky faucet in my bathroom stopped dripping. The commotion of the cars outside completely stopped, it was unnerving. I walked outside and nobody, nothing was moving. I being a logical person and having seen movies and read books about the relation of sand and time, immediately knew what had happened. Turns out it was some magical hourglass that controlled the flow of time. So I went to collect up the sand and put it back in to the hourglass not wanting to permanently break the universe. We all know it’s bad juju to mess with time, pesky paradoxes, something about sleeping with your grandmother and becoming your own grandpa (talk about screwing up time and creating a grandfather paradox). Great way to avoid doing it at an Alabama family reunion and having your cousin get jealous, but it’s been said that it can make for some other major problems for the universe similar to trying to divide by zero. Anyways I put as much of the sand back into the hourglass as possible, but it was carpet and I couldn’t get it all back in and I didn’t want to use a vacuum cleaner. Anyways, long story short, I seem to have lost track of some time (sand), and then had to write out this novella of a message because I didn’t think you would believe me without some back story (which took some time). Then I would still have to get ready ( which takes even more time). So, seems time got away from me after all so would you mind if we get together another time when I have some free time to spare?
