Not good. I’m actually doing really bad. … Yesterday was bad, too. The whole week. I’m just so unhappy.
Well, you know, it's the meaningless and hopelessness again. Like there's no point to anything I do.
I go through the motions but it all feels so empty. Like there's a piece of me missing, you know? Something's missing inside me, and there's this deep sadness that follows me everywhere I go.
And it's like … it takes all my energy just to exist, and I’m always so exhausted. Every morning I wake up feeling more tired than when I went to sleep the night before.
Oh, and it feels like it’s never going to end. Like this is somehow eternal. Like I’m stuck in this sad loop that never ends, you know?
I also feel like there’s something out to get me. Like there are things following me around all the time. Everywhere I go, I feel like they’re watching me.
I actually saw one the other day. It was this … how do I describe it. It was the most terrifying creature I’ve ever seen in my life. Leaning against the wall in the corner, just looking at me with … with the most hideous, malicious grin on its face. I’ve never seen a face so full of evil. Like it wanted to kill me, but not quite as much as it wanted to watch me suffer. Then it just vanished.
I’m hearing things, too. Sounds like people screaming. It wakes me up a lot at night.
Well, the suicidal thoughts. But that’s every day, I have to fight those off pretty much every day.
What do you mean?
What the — !? Did you just tell me I should kill myself?
What in God’s name are you talking about? I don't follow.
What? You’re crazy. There’s no way I’m —
This … This is impossible.
I am NOT in denial! Or in hell, either! You’ve got to be —
This doesn’t make any sense at all. And why would hell need psychologists, anyway?
What the … So how long have I been here? How long have I been coming to see you??
This is just unbelievable. How come I don’t remember any of those other sessions, huh? Why don’t I —
But I was a believer! I believed in God!! How come I didn’t go to heaven?
😈😈😈
Hello from the high Rockies of Colorado. My name is Brandt, pleased to meet you. I’m a marketing copywriter. I live in a little ghost town called Leadville. If you like mountains, snow, jokes, running, hiking, breathing, not working, etc., then you and I have a lot in common. Thanks for stopping by, and have a lovely day!