This isn't a news report about Demi Lovato's overdose, but this is my heartfelt thoughts on it. It seems like she has had great support from fans; however, I have unfortunately seen negativity on Social Media as well. I really have a special spot in my heart for Demi because even though I do not know her, last year my father died and I didn't even know how to grieve his death, but her music helped me. Nothing matched what I was feeling, until I came across two of her amazing songs and I played them on repeat for a couple days. The songs were "Father" and "Warrior."
I was shocked at the talent and depth that Demi had in these songs. Songs that I never heard on the radio, but lyrically were amazing and had a message that could help me, and probably many others. As I looked more into her biography, I learned that she had an abusive father who had substance abuse problems, but he passed away. She also struggles with bipolar disorder and addiction.
By her music alone, these hidden songs most of us never knew about, it is obvious that she has had some deep wounds starting from childhood. These are wounds that even when they heal, they easily slice back open just by looking around and seeing how one's life differs from others. I know this because I felt that pain last year when I was planning for my wedding. You never realize how much not having a father around whether estranged or deceased can impact you until events like a wedding come up.
I actually considered eloping in Las Vegas at the chapel that an Elvis impersonator walks you down the isle just to make a fun spectacle out of the question brides have to face over and over again "who is going to walk you down the isle?" It was actually bittersweet when I accidentally stumbled upon the wedding chapel when I visited Vegas this past April because I thought... wow, that was one of my wedding options, so that impostor Elvis could save the day with a stroll down the isle, and maybe even a daddy-daughter dance. It was so awkward to explain over and over again that there would only be a groom and mother dance when I spoke with my reception venue. Even more awkward when people suggested I do the father and daughter dance with my father-in-law, or my mother. (Just in case you want to see photos I took of the chapel, they are below)
I know I'm chasing bunny rabbits in this post, but beautiful things like getting married can make some of us have to fight off the dark cloud that tries to come in and remind children of estranged parents that their life was not normal, and is not what it should have been. I am fortunate to say I am not an addict, and luckily did not receive the addiction gene, but I can say that I know what deep hurt has felt like, so deep that I wished for almost anything that could numb the pain. That is why I can understand how a person could turn to substances to cope with life and its struggles. For Demi, dealing with inherited traits such as mental health or substance abuse issues are already difficult, but to throw extra on top of it, like a dysfunctional childhood can add an additional layer of pain.
Once again, I don't know Demi personally, but I know what she has shared about herself in interviews and in her music, and I know that her battle is a tough one. I hope she overcomes her inner struggles because I know there are many lives she could continue to touch just as she touched mine with her music. We don't have to be perfect people. Life sometimes brings us hardship, and we will have good days and bad days, but in the end there is value, whether it is found in the struggle, the person's testimony, or in the purpose the person brings this world.
I hope for Demi's recovery. She recently released a heartfelt and honest song about her lapse of sobriety called "Sober." This is a girl in pain, and I will not bash her. I will commend her strength to admit her short comings, and hope that it is the first step to recovery, not matter how many times she has to pick herself back up.
