Harold’s pants began to shake violently. His phone ascended magically from his pocket. The battery instantly drained, and the screen shattered into tiny pieces before his very eyes. His friend Rob ran in excitedly.
“Hey Harold, guess what?!”
“Apple just announced they’re releasing a new phone?”
“Yeah, how’d you know?”
I know, I know, everyone loves to bash Apple, but it's only because they deserve it.
This was an entry for a weekly challenge hosted by 
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