Friendship, to me, is one of the most valuable parts of life. It's more than just having people to hang out with it’s about connection, understanding, and mutual respect. As I’ve grown older, I’ve realized that not everyone who walks into my life is meant to stay, and not everyone deserves the title of “friend.” Over time, I’ve developed my own criteria for choosing who I allow into my inner circle. These standards aren't about being judgmental they're about protecting my peace and making sure I surround myself with people who align with my values.
First and foremost, honesty is non-negotiable. I need friends who tell the truth, even when it's uncomfortable. I don’t expect perfection none of us are flawless but I do expect honesty. If someone lies easily or hides things from me, it becomes hard for me to trust them. Trust is the foundation of any strong relationship, and once it’s broken, it’s incredibly difficult to rebuild. I’d rather have a hard truth than a comforting lie any day.
Loyalty is another huge factor for me. Life has its ups and downs, and during the tough times, I want to know who will still stand beside me. A true friend doesn’t disappear when things get inconvenient or uncomfortable. They don’t gossip behind my back or only show up when they need something. Loyalty means being consistent being there, even in silence. I value friends who choose me, not just when it’s easy, but when it’s hard.
Another standard I’ve set is kindness not just towards me, but towards others too. It matters to me how a person treats people who can’t do anything for them. If someone is sweet to me but rude to a waiter or dismissive of strangers, that tells me all I need to know. Kindness should be a natural part of who someone is, not something they turn on or off depending on who’s watching.
I also look for people who respect boundaries both mine and their own. I need friendships where I can say “no” without guilt, where space is understood and not taken personally. I value emotional maturity and the ability to talk through problems instead of avoiding them or blowing them out of proportion. I don’t need drama in my life I need peace, growth, and people who understand that respect goes both ways.
Lastly, I want friends who make me feel seen, heard, and understood. We don’t have to agree on everything, but I want to feel safe being myself around them. The right people bring out the best in you they inspire you, support you, and hold you accountable when needed.
In the end, I don’t need a large circle. A few genuine people who meet these standards are more than enough. Friendship isn’t about popularity it’s about quality. I’m learning to choose carefully, love deeply, and always value the connections that feel real. Life’s too short to settle for anything less.
Have a wonderful read
With love, blackbird ❤️
