As a migrant from Germany to Ecuador I have the privilege of hating two countries. Just kidding. Though both have their perks and flaws, I've come to a point that I can see all of the latter with a lot of humor while enjoying the former.
If you want Germans and Ecuadorians to meet at your place at 3pm, tell the Ecuadorians 2.30pm, and the Germans 3.30pm.
Stuff like that. So many stereotypes are true, yet seen with humor, it's absolutely manageable. Even the bureaucracy. I see getting a visa or anything else in Ecuador as an adventure, a challenge that requires my A-Game. Charming the person at the desk, chit-chat with the security guard, putting all my curiosity on the table, asking questions about their jobs, not only making them feel seen, but see them. I'm genuine in that. And it gets everything done a lot quicker.
Know how.
Quite important. I understand why many people hate the unpunctuality and the bureaucracy of weak minded suddenly equipped with power, but there's no changing that. If you can't change a thing, work on yourself to be able to embrace it and take something away, some lesson, something that makes it fun.
Not everything is.
I do hate the violence. I haven't lived in Germany for 12 years, so I'm not sure if it's a general phenomena in our globalized societies of individualism - I'd love to blame the latter for that, too. But Ecuador reeks of it. Violence against animals, violence against women, violence against children. Not only physical, but so much psychological violence, and it's so absurdly normalized. It's in every day speech, in the jokes, everywhere. I had a very hard time adapting to that.
Maybe never did.
I'm sometimes accused of not being empathetic with street dogs or people. I don't treat them badly, I just don't pity them like others do. I can't. It would be too much for me. I rather focus on the few that I can help, and help those with all my heart. And I say that.
Directly.
The good thing about the bad is always that it shows me how I don't want to be. I always make the half-joke of Ecuadorians only finishing the facades, but never painting or even plastering the sides of houses, because they, too are just like that. A friendly smile in your face, smack talking behind your back. The level of hypocrisy in treating each other is still astounding me. Although I'm quite sure that it's just in every place in the world.
Some more, some less.
As with everything. A just like with everything, there's a good in the bad - the chance to use it as an antagonist. That's not how I want to be. I don't want to be an unfiltered direct shooter either - directness without kindness is cruelty, or something like that, I once read and it stuck to me. So, I work towards a balance.
Neither culture is perfect.
But somewhere in the middle, I feel like I'm doing right by myself, and by raising Lily that way.
What are your thoughts about this topic? Please feel free to engage in any original way, including dropping links to your posts on similar topics. I'm happy to read (and curate) any quality content that is not created by LLM/AI.
Post written for the #weekend-engagement by inviting us to answer selected questions in the Weekend Experiences community each week.
This is my response to:
5/ Do you ever hate the country and location in which you live and if so why?
Thank you for reading!