Why is asking for help so hard when we’re adults?... #loh307

An image of me

Have you ever needed help but still found yourself saying, “ anyhow I’ll figure it out myself”?

You know that you are struggling with something, there is someone you could call.

And you even know that person probably wouldn't mind helping you but somehow, picking up the phone to say please, I need help, feels harder than dealing with the problem alone. And you will be like, how will I even ask this person for help when I'm sure he got his own problem to solve... It feels more harder to even think of it

I think growing up does something funny to us because as kids we were, asking for help was a normal thing to us.

If we couldn't reach something, we called an adult. If we didn't understand our homework, we asked questions, if we were scared, we would run to someone.

Then we grew up and suddenly started thinking we should be able to handle everything ourselves

I have caught myself doing this, things without number, I can be trying to figure something out, getting frustrated, going round in circles, and still refusing to ask for help because a part of me feels like, I should know how to do this.

This affected me in some aspect, I couldn't ask my father for a financial help nor my sisters cause I thought I could handled that moment, but that opportunity passed me by, I learnt my lesson that day

Another day, when I was trying to solve something on my own for longer than necessary, like fixing some sockets in the house, I had already become frustrated, tired, and convinced that I was supposed to figure it out.

Lol😂

I was like, noooo I need to reach out to my one of my friend, and when I finally reached out, the guy helped me understand it in a way I hadn't considered also fixed it without charge

And honestly, my first thought was, “so I suffered all this time for what I knew nothing about

That experience stayed with me

Maybe one of the hardest parts of adulthood is accepting that you can be capable and still need help.

We sometimes confuse independence with doing everything alone, wanting to be strong, to let people know that they can depend on us.

We don't just want to look incapable, needy, or like we don't have our lives together.

But the truth is, nobody has everything figured out, yes no one

There will be days when you need advice, days when you need someone to listen, I mean times, when you need practical help.

And moments where you simply need someone to say, “Don't worry, I've got you.”

And that doesn't take anything away from you, because no man is an island.

Sometimes, growing up isn't learning how to do everything alone, it is learning when to say, I can handle this myself, and when to be honest enough to say, I actually need a little help.

Just so you know, asking for help isn't a weakness, it means you tried your best and gave your all, till you got exhausted

Selah