Hello everyone Happy New month to you all,may all your wishes come true this new month.
I have always wondered why love sometimes turn sour or turn into hatred after sometime,i have heard so many people say "this is not how we started,we loved each other so much then but now we aren't in so much love".
Before I start to write about the reason why marriage turn sour after a long time,let me say this, relationship is not just about love,it is not I love you and you love me too,you must be intentional,you are intentional about that other person you want to spend the rest of your life with, sometimes you might not feel that butterflies in your stomach for that person but something has to keep you going, something like commitment,when you are so committed to that person,even when it's not feeling like it you will still stick with your partner.
Reasons why marriages turn sour after some couple of years
When you first started, I mean before you got married,you always communicate well, every little thing you tell your partner about it,how your day went,the things you are doing and all,you gist,talk, laugh together but later on you realized that you don't talk well anymore.
Now you are both keeping secrets from each other,there is a gap in your communication,all you need to do is fix it,start all over,stop keeping things from each other,help the other to fix what is bothering them,communicate more,let your partner know how you feel.
This is one of the most important thing that breaks marriage,this is especially for the ladies,when you were still courting you dress well,wear your cologne,fix your hair,you don't dress shabbily,you always want to attract your partner but now that you are married,you start to dress that like grandma, some ladies will start tying wrapper up and down,you become less attractive to your man by doing that,you leave the house scattered,no sweeping,no cleaning,you throw your paper in the sitting room or anywhere in the house instead of the dustbin,and now you are saying he's not attracted to you anymore,it doesn't work that way, always try to be attractive to him,stop tying wrapper,wear good cloths,wear clothes that will turn his head whenever you are inside the house.
This is really common to alot of couples,they go to cinema,go for late nights dates,buy gifts for each other during their courtship but when they get married they stop doing those things, getting married doesn't stop you from going on dates, picnics,love feasts,cinema.
it should continue even after marriage,it will keep the Sparks on in relationship, marriage is not just about love,it should be built,if you don't build your marriage it might collapse,keep the sparks on. Ignite the fire 馃敟.
Let me talk about this too, sometimes little things makes the relationship go sour when you don't do them e.g love messages, happy new month messages, some people do not send messages to their partner, some thought it doesn't matter,but can I tell you this,it really matters.
Guys do this too when they want a lady to fall in love with them,they comment on their pictures but as soon as the lady accept their proposals they stop commenting,why? Because you don't want her to feel herself abi.... Let her feel herself please,you shouldn't have started when you know you can't continue complementing her, complements keep the sparks on,you are not doing this things for anybody,you are doing it for yourselves.
You trusted your partner when you started but now you don't trust him or her,why? Distrust in a relationship makes it die,it won't grow,talk to your partner about the reason why you don't trust them again and solve it.
People don't like it when you doubt them,you two should talk about it and make it work.
I can boldly say this has caused alot of issues between husband and wife, some men will say "After she gave birth she stopped focusing on me and all she does is focus only on our baby,she doesn't care about me anymore".
Most of the time this is true,the woman tend to face her child more than the husband,she gives all her attention to her child and thereby making them grow apart, because you have a child now doesn't mean you shouldn't attend to your husband,I know you will say it's not easy and I know it's not easy but you should try and manage it well,that's why you are a woman,both needs attention from you, and also the husband should be understanding,it's not easy to take care of a child,it's not easy at all, some husband don't even care,they can't carry their own baby,you want the woman to do everything,cook for you and at the same time carry the baby,breastfeed the baby why you sit down and watch TV,it's not fair at all,its not only her baby but yours too.
Conclusion: be intentional about your relationship,watch out for the red flags and work on it, don't stop doing the things you were doing before you got married, keep sparkling your marriages.
