Coffee isn't just to wake me up every mornings and give me the enough energy for the day. Keeping the grumpiness away is part of my morning rituals since I'm not the morning person type who is cheerful and optimistic as the ray of sunshine beaming through your window curtains to your bed. I'm more of the gloomy skies with thunders in the morning that will gradually disappear as the noon approaches.
And here's how it kicked me back to my sense all the time!
You know what usually happens when you're not in a mood, right? All the negativity and the sudden shift of perspectives runs through your mind making you rethink all your life choices and always second guessing. When you don't really have to, but your hormones say so.
It is my escape every time I feel like that it's only me against the world. When life gives me lemons, and I don't know how to make a lemonade. Why make a lemonade when I can make a cup of coffee and sit it out in a serene place? If the world don't want me in my thoughts, I'll be alone for a while to straighten my perspectives and contemplate deeply as I drink my coffee in silence.
Bittersweet!
Sometimes, I drink black coffee and sometimes an iced latte.
Life stormed in me and I almost drowned. I've got no one to talk to at the moment. Instead of lashing it out on just anyone or anything at hand, I went to a nearby mall and bought an iced latte.
I couldn't care less if I'm staring at the cars as if I wanted to burn them down or if I looked like I hated the world. I just let myself to be like that for a moment, and a little while later, I just calmed down as the coolness of the Iced Latte bit my tongue rising through my head. It seemed to freeze the negativity and I just felt better after that.
"Why am I even overthinking things? I'll cross that bridge when I get there," i thought to myself, then left the area and went home.
A cup is for discussions, but caffeine is to have courage to start the discussions.
Interpersonal skills aren't my forte because I'm an introverted person. Yet, how many lost opportunities will I be counting in my fingers every time due to that kind of personality? So, I'm summoning the courage I could gather every time to join such activities involving a group or a crowd.
I was always hesitant to try things out of my comfort zone, when I'm uncertain of my capabilities, and I'm not confident with my skills. It's just amazing how a kick of caffeine can do to my nerves. They say that you get more sensitive or vulnerable to anxiety when you drink more coffee, but what I've got is the reverse effect I guess. I'm calm when I can have one.
When I'm calm, I can formulate ideas and join in a discussion where I never expected myself to do. It's not magic, but it works!
"Starve your distractions, feed your focus!" -unknown
Here's another iced latte in a hot afternoon before the class hours start again until the evening. When brain fogs hit you when you needed your brain the most, it's time for another dose of caffeine. And so, I stopped by on a coffee stall of Don Macchiattos near the school area.
And this is how I feed my focus, through coffee. I'm alert and sharp when I can have this before my classes. The subject never gets boring when you're eager to learn because your mind is clear from distractions.
Some might say that I spent too much in coffee but it helps me live my life normally, so why not?
October 3, 2023
馃尭 ayane-chan
All of the photos in this blog are mine unless stated otherwise. Thank you for taking some time to read. Have a good day!
