Published via Ecency

Good Day Folks.

i experience a few addictions, mostly smoking tobacco (and sometimes pot), over-eating, and over-reading (whether physical books or online). Basically DOing too much as opposed to BEing.

It's mostly a conscious choice. i'm well aware of what i'm doing. It's like i'm keeping one foot partly on the brake, slowing down the speed of my awakening journey. It's kinda funny :-), but not particularly responsible! Que sera sera.

Sometimes though, if i'm present enough, the reading can bring gifts, as i wrote in this DBuzz.

i could choose to DO more stuff which would help lead to more BEing, such as yoga & meditation practice and #garden work. Not only are these more conducive to present moment awareness (BEingness) but also there would be less time for the not so present DOing stuff.

Yesterday evening i ran out of tobacco. Knowing i would soon run out i had considered earlier taking the 18 minute walk to Tesco's to buy a pack, but had decided not too. Well, now it's nearly mid-day and i've still not gone to buy more. Usually i'll have my first roll-up of the day after breakfast & coffee around 10am.

i guess i'm challenging myself a bit. Whenever the thought to smoke comes, i'll apply the conscious breathing awareness technique i wrote about in this post. i in-courage you to click through and take a read.

i'll probably take that walk later today & buy some, as i've not made the decision yet to quit.
It's not that i haven't quit before, i have many times. The longest was for about 15 months i think, when i was in Mexico and was opening a healing retreat centre. i mean, i could hardly smoke then could i? It would have been hypocritical. But about 15 months later i started again, despite still running the retreat centre. Of course i smoked outside, and washed to disguise the smell when i returned, but didn't exactly hide what i was doing.

Actually, thinking back, i quit once, about 35 years ago, for several years, having followed Alan Carr's Easy Way to Stop Smoking. And i recall that it was easy!

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The shortest period i've given up smoking? Well, every week or two when i play this game of running out and not buying more for a few hours, or a day or two. i'm not beating myself up about it, it is what it is. Observing the dream character & his consciousness of his not so conscious actions :+).

Ok, back to some reading (and checking crypto prices every half hour or so :-).

The #book i'm currently #reading is by Dick Francis, an excellent author. At the moment (very close to the end of the book), the main character is attempting to get out of the forest before he dies with an arrow through his body!

The "good" news is it looks like i've found someone responsible & caring to look after Mum so i can return to my #homestead in #Bulgaria. It's been a year, and i only just started looking properly. i wrote to a local #Buddhist centre & asked if anyone was interested, and got a positive response. Just tying up the details and then i can fly free (in about a month or so :-).

There'll be lots of work to do in the garden when i get back, weeding and planting seeds will be the first priority. It's already a bit late. i have volunteers (well, work exchangers) come to help. Already there are two wanting to come when i return. We practice meditation & yoga every morning and eat very well, organic vegan food, and sometimes i'll invite guests for a "retreat", but it's alway kinda like a retreat, with cows, horses, mountains and trees for neighbours :-)