@meesterboom, I am sorry to hear about your loss, I read your post word for word and I could feel the pain, I too know what it's like to lose someone close.
My grandmother was like my mum and 9 years ago she passed, still thinking about the day hurts and I find it hard to talk about it.
She fell at my mums house and broke her hip, I used to joke years ago that it would happen and it f*cking well did.
This lead to a heart attack then a stroke all in the same day, but somehow she managed to pull through, she ended up in a care home, a place that she never wanted to go, and over the stage of a year she slowly passed away. Me and my mum layed with her and held her hand while she slipped away, it was peaceful and even though it was a sad time, I think it was easier saying goodbye than it suddenly happening.
Hard times my friend, your right though it does get easier, but still to this day I find it hard.