It is a strange irony that in the early days human porn was what drove the internet.
Today however, it is said that Cat Porn is by far the biggest interest on web today.
One only has to look on YouTube to realize that there are huge Cat Porn stars out there who making big time money.
In my younger days I was your typical starving artist type and so to make ends meet I used to take commissions to paint portraits of cats and dogs, but mostly cats.
Cats are much easier than humans which meant I could paint them quickly and thus not have to charge as much. This really helped pay the bills and in fact at one time I painted six cat portraits in one week. Almost one a day. As time went by commissions for portraits of people began to increase and so I had no time for doing any more cat portraits.
As of today I do not do portraits of any kind due to developing my own style and have exhibitions instead. Just now I am working on getting work together for a future exhibition. However, as every artist will know, while the are in the process, it means that not much income is coming into the house.
So I wondered if there was some way I could earn some extra cash to help pay the bills.
Then the idea of doing cat portraits came to mind and with the rise of cat porn I felt this was a good idea.
It was getting late into the evening but I just couldn´t wait and so I decided to go straight to it and present the case to my own cat, called ´Nino.`
Nino said he would "sleep on the matter" and then curled himself up for the night.
See below
Next morning I went and eagerly asked Nino if he had come to any thoughts on the matter.
"What matter?" Was his first response, but once he had woken up a little more he explained that had indeed given it some thought but that he could not make up his mind until he had read the morning newspaper and had his usual cup of coffee. As the diligent cat owner that I am, I went and got his ´The Financial Paw Times` from the doormat and made him his usual coffee, (just the way he likes it), and then went and did some work in my studio.
I went to to see if El Nino was ready to talk further on the matter, but I was disappointed to see that he had once again fallen asleep...on his newspaper.
Perhaps it was just full of fake cat news and he got bored I thought.
See below
I figured that he had given the matter so much intense thought that perhaps he had tired out his little brain.
So I decided to give the guy some space and try again later after he was rested.I heard Nino in the kitchen making himself something to eat.
"A there you are Nino. I take it you are well rested and ready to talk about my idea of you modeling for me?" I asked, politely of course. However, he did seem very enthusiastic.
"What exactly do I have to do?" Nino asked.
I went on to explain that all he had to do was to sit on one of his famous cute poses while I painted his portrait. When it was finished I would then sell these portraits on Peer Hub on Steemit. Nino responded by rolling his eyes.
"Well, I am a somewhat skeptical that there would be a market for such pictures.
Tell you what, you get me some statistics to back up your idea and that would go a long way to help me make a decision." Said Nino.
This gave me some encouragement that I could eventually persuade him.
So I spent four hours online looking at charts and graphs showing the number of people who are watching cat porn on YouTube. This was made even harder as, ever since he was a kitten, Nino like to sit on the keyboard when I go onto the web.
However in spite of that, I did managed to get some really good information.
I printed out over ten pages of information backing up my belief that cat porn portraits would be a sure winner. I handed Nino all of this valuable pile of paper and asked him to have a look though and assured him that he would soon see that the figures would prove that I was right.
"OK, I will get myself comfortable on the sofa and have a good look through them. Give me some time and I promise I will give you an answer later." Said my guy
It was now around 6pm and so I decided to do some more work in the studio and give Nino some quiet time in order for him to read all the relevant information. Indeed, it was a lot to take in, therefore I figured that the best thing I could do was to stay out of his way.
I quickly washed and dried my brushes and placed all the lids back on the paint tubes and then ran into the front room. However, I must admit I did feel slightly disappointed at the sight that I was presented with.
See below.
I would not say I was an impatient man, indeed, to be an artist one needs much patience in order to create a work of art, but if I am honest I was beginning to feel a little irritated.
"What...what is it? Oh what did you wake me for I was having a great dream about that Cat babe on YouTube. Have you seen her tail, just gorgeous." Grumbled Nino
"Nino Im a little disappointed. After all the work I did getting the information, that YOU asked for, and then what do you go and do? Fall asleep all over it."
I said in a slightly stern voice.
"What? What information are you talking..oh yeah that, no listen Arthur I went though all of it, even reading the fine detail, and to be honest I was quite mentally exhausted afterwards. I guess I just nodded off. Forgive me" Responded Nino, and he genuinely sounded sorry.
And now I felt guilty.
"Oh Im sorry Nino I feel bad for waking you now. So you did read through it then? What did you think?" I asked eagerly.
"Sure yeah er great job you did there Arthur. But well erm, I still have some reservations but on the whole I think it could work.
But you know what I always say, never make a quick decision. Always wait until you have looked at it with fresh eyes the next day. So let´s talk about it in the morning shall we.
Now if you don´t mind Arthur, I would like to get back to my dream."
Said Nino giving me that sly smile of his.
"Sure sure, sorry for waking you. Have a good sleep. I will make you a nice hot cup of coffee in the morning." I said, and crept out of the room to let the guy sleep.
He´s a good cat really, I thought.
I had set my alarm for 8am so that I could get up early and get Nino´s coffee ready. I also put a nice soft cushion onto his wooden chair in the kitchen.
It was Wednesday and so I knew he would be in a good mood. Wednesday his the day his favorite magazine arrives. There is nothing more Nino likes to do than settling down with his copy of Cat Hombre Weekly.
I sneak in and catch him stretching. I bring in his coffee as well as his magazine and tell him to just to take his time as I had to go out to do some shopping and that when I came back I would be eager to hear his decision.
I quickly put away the shopping, deliberately making a noise so that Nino could hear I was back. Actually I had a sneaky feeling he was gong to go for the idea and I could almost hear the sweet sound of Steem cash falling from the ceiling.
However, this is what greeted me when I walked in.
See below
Now my patience was over and I shouted:
I shouted so loud that I even made myself jump so it was not surprising that Nino flew three feet up into the air and dived behind the sofa. Over an hour he stayed there sulking and it took me to open a fresh tin of spam to coax him out.
"Im sorry for shouting Nino but this is important. We need some extra income while I am busy getting an exhibition together and I think this is a good way of doing it. I can draw fast and you would not need to pose too long." I explained.
He just looked at me like I had just tried to murder him.
"I understand Arthur. Im not stupid. But I have a delicate heart you know that, and well with all that shouting my nerves are shattered. I need to have some quiet time for an hour or so to calm down. After that, well I guess we can discuss it more. But please, no more shouting"
He said, and then skulked off into the front room again.
There he was snoring his head off curled up into a ball.
It was hard to be mad at him when he looked like that but I was beginning to believe he was never going to make a decision on the matter. But then I noticed that he had been writing.
Oh, he has been writing some notes.
Well that shows that he as at least taken the matter seriously. I thought. I know I shouldn´t but I just could not resist having a sneaky look while he was asleep.
And so I carefully pulled it our from under him and I immediately saw that it was a letter.
See for yourself what it says...
Thank your for reading and thank you for visiting my Steemit space:
A warm welcome back to you next time.
All illustrations used in this post are my own original artwork
