I just went in the creek again today for the fourth time in less than a week!
Dang, I'm really going for it. ._.
I went back to that popular "dirty" spot I like and there were so many people there... But, I found it interesting that this time I was really sort of... Appreciating everyone's presence and being happy for the people in relationships and happy for everyone who was having fun!
In the past when I was younger and depressed I used to go down to the creek I always used to be jealous of people in relationships, and I admit I was still a "little" jealous seeing people like making out and being intimate by the creek and stuff lol, but I have much more feelings of happiness for them now than I used to! And, I also used to think that everyone was either laughing at me, making fun of me or that they just didn't like me for some reason even if they didn't know me at all...
I used to walk around so insecure and ready to fight cause that's how it felt growing up around here with the friends I had and the people who I was around, but now I look at everyone and see other versions of myself (Or "God") who I love and wish the best for. It's quite an amazing difference to see how radically my perspective has changed!
I also used to be very shy and even though I wanted to meet someone in a romantic sense whenever an attractive woman showed interest in me I would get terrified and try to escape and get away basically... Lol... Now these days I'm so much more confident and better able to talk and communicate that I think maybe I might end up making some new friends if I keep going down there!
So... This time I did two cannonballs and I dove in twice as well! Was the first time I have dived in the water in like 10+ years. The second time I dove in it kinda jarred me a lil bit... I think maybe I didn't break the water with my hands enough or something... And then I just tried to stay in the cold water for a long time to try to gain the health benefits of the cold.
And... I once again feel so refreshed and amazing I wish I would have gotten over this OCD fear a long time ago!!
I'm actually quite tired though... I wanted to jump in more, but my body started feeling a little strained so I decided to go home. I feel like maybe I've been working some muscles, tendons, ligaments or other connective tissues I haven't worked in a long time and if I keep going swimming like this I'm probably going to keep getting stronger and healthier! :)
Anyways... I think that's everything interesting that happened for the most part. Peace much love and bye until next time! <3
