Before anyone worries I just want to say this picture is not recent, it's from years ago when I got sick with botulism.
That being said... There's been something I haven't talked about yet because I was trying to figure out if I was going to take legal action, but... I waited till it was almost too late and then when my father got sick and almost died I became too busy/overwhelmed mentally and the time window for doing that ran out so I can talk about it now.
So... When I was sick with botulism a few years ago I was sent to a hospital in Phoenix and I was in pretty bad shape, I had barely eaten anything in a week and was significantly paralyzed and I got to the point where I was waking up in the morning with such incredibly horrible dry mouth that my tongue was sticking to the side of my mouth and it terrified me cause it made harder to talk and breath on top of everything else I was dealing with.
I'm highly skeptical of a lot of the drugs the medical industry puts people on so I was being very inquisitive and asking about all the potential benefits versus side effects of everything they were trying to give me and when they wanted to put me on a drug that had "dehydration" as one of the main side effects I said no and "refused" it because I was already so incredibly dehydrated that it was scaring me making me think I might die in my sleep or something.
I could go into some more detail about that, but for the sake of time I'll just say that I found out that the nurse gave that drug to me to me anyways even though I clearly and directly refused it and that's when I started going downhill really bad and got to the point where I couldn't even lay in bed without my lungs basically shutting down to the point I couldn't breathe on my own.
I personally think there was a connection between being put on that drug and almost dying.
Right before I was put in the ICU and put on life support I remembered talking to my sister on the phone and telling her what happened and I could barely talk, it sounded like muffled gibberish... I couldn't even understand the words coming out of my own mouth and that terrified me...
Was one of the scariest feelings to feel like the medical people were killing me and I couldn't even tell my sister or get help because I couldn't talk.
Thankfully she understood me enough to get on a plane from Colorado and come help me in person, she probably saved my life.
We got that nurse removed from working with me any further, but... There were actually quite a few other numerous cases where I feel like some of the medical people almost killed me and the point of this post is mostly to emphasize how important it is to stand up for yourself and believe in yourself and advocate for yourself and try to be aware of what's going on and when possible educate yourself as much as you can and don't just "trust" other people 100% completely even if they are "experts" or "professionals".
Even the experts and professionals make mistakes or are wrong in other ways and if you don't take a serious interest in your own health you will likely be putting your health into the hands of other people and some of them might not care very much, they might just be doing that job for the money and might not be very passionate about helping you or saving your life.
It was a crime what they did to me literally. Both a U.S. crime and a world crime. There was the whole "Nuremberg" thing after WW2 where the Nazi's were experimenting on people and forcing medical treatments on them and the powers of the world at the time decided that it was wrong to force medical treatments on people who didn't want them.
It was scary. Some of the medical people were neglecting me and treating me so bad I thought I might die and the worst that would happen to them was they'd maybe lose their job... I felt so incredibly at their mercy and now I feel so incredibly lucky to be alive right now...
To be clear, there were some awesome medical staff who really cared a lot and helped me a lot. Especially my physical therapist and occupational therapist and
speech therapists... I'm still friends with a few of them on Facebook who were really kind to me.
And, they almost certainly saved my life, though I have to wonder if I would have got that bad if they didn't force that drug on me or if they had listened to me and my family from the beginning when we said over and over again that we thought it was botulism instead of waiting until I was about dead to test for it.
Also... Just remembered that the other day I had a vision of myself not surviving the experience with botulism and ending up in a body bag and that was quite disturbing... I feel like I came really close to dying and that it's a miracle I'm still here.
I was fighting for my friggin life almost the entire time I was in the hospital, for like around two months if I remember correctly... I'm literally surprised I'm still alive because I thought there was a good chance I would die much of that time.
I guess I would just finish by saying that... It's important to tell each other how much we love each other, especially because it can all be gone so quick... This is one reason why I tell everyone I love them so much. I almost lost that chance, so why not shower people with love when I came so close to being dead and not being able to do that anymore?
I love you all so much no matter what you have done. So much love... ❤️
