Time - as I perceive it - goes by very differently while I'm on Hive than in my fiat reality... It slows down quite considerably, and I'm still not sure if its because I spend so much time learning (but not quite grasping) all that goes on here, or perhaps its because of time spent thinking up new topics for posts, counting days to payout, or is it the socializing that just starts small and then grows into this big buzz... Whatever it is, it augments my perception of time - making days appear longer, which I'm inclined to think is a good thing, even though I'm aware that there are no real minutes or hours gained - just my own mind running on its own blockchaiN8dfGT6iqPI9.
So,
Where do I take it from here?
It's been 7 years since my last 'post' (do we have a better word yet?)
Well, its no biggie, cause I honestly forgot how to write.
In my last post, I was also looking for a word... I was contemplating on the emotions that places evoke... that romantic melancholy that awaits you in an old historic site, that dwells among the mossy ruins in such a natural yet cinematic way, that it summons in you a sudden rush of both existential awe and dread. It's like witnessing time, and the unintended beauty of decay, much akin to Wabi Sabi, but far less intentional - you can't create it - it simply comes to you.
At the time of publishing that post, (in the preapocalyptic year of 2018), I really couldn't ask Google "hey, what do you call that feeling?" so I left with no answer.
But ever since the apocalypse started, I was able to ask ChatGPT to help me find the right word.
I prompted her (using the exact words from my post):
Do you know the following feeling?
What is it called? You visit a place you never been to before, usually an old ruin or an abandoned site, there is nothing particularly stunning about it, but you suddenly feel an intimate connection with this place and the atmosphere surrounding it... As this emotion envelops you, with it comes a surge of existential reflection, melancholy, a sense of peace and the desire to stay in that place... It seems to be something that many people experience, often when they travel abroad, and especially when they visit historical sites... Often times the place where this emotion dwells is secluded and affected by a natural decay, such as a moss-covered weathered stone. Also this feeling can be amplified by a cloudy overcast, that causes the place to appear more solemn but also more alive as the colors become more vivid, and the air smells fresh... It's not just the place, it's also a moment in time, which seems to evoke some sort of deep connection. Given any different time, lighting and company, the place wouldn’t have the same kind of effect... and trying to recreate it might not be that easy...
She replied:
Yes — that feeling is real, and while there isn't one perfect English word that fully captures its depth and complexity, several terms and ideas get close. What you're describing touches on aesthetics, memory, longing, transience, and the sublime. Let’s break it down and look at some words that might help name or frame this emotional experience:
A deep emotional state of nostalgic or melancholic longing for something or someone absent — often with the understanding that the object of longing might never return.
Though usually tied to people or times, some feel saudade in spaces — especially decayed or historical places that seem to hold echoes of the past.
An intense, deep yearning for something indefinite — a “longing for a far-off place,” sometimes not even known.
Fits well with your mention of existential reflection, the urge to stay, the feeling that you're touching something timeless and just out of reach.
A homesickness for a home you can’t return to, or that maybe never was.
Particularly appropriate if the emotion feels ancestral or tied to some imagined past.
The “ahh-ness” of things; the bittersweet awareness of the impermanence of beauty.
Deeply connected to the idea that something is beautiful because it’s fleeting, like the mossy ruin in soft overcast light.
A more modern word, originally coined to describe the emotional distress caused by environmental change in one’s home environment — but it has evolved.
It can be stretched to describe a longing or melancholy tied to place, especially decaying or changing landscapes.
A fascination or romantic longing for decaying or ruined places, especially those overtaken by nature.
Not an emotion in itself, but it often triggers the kinds of feelings you're describing.
🌀 Other Concepts That Might Resonate:
Anemoia (coined in The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows) – nostalgia for a time you've never known.
Liminal space – places that feel like thresholds, between past and present, real and surreal; often emotionally charged and hard to articulate.
Yes friends, the apocalypse is here; she's incredibly generous and very polite, though a total bitch for giving me the best word last.
So, of course, its got to be Ruinenlust - It sums up the aesthetic, psychological and spiritual moment many travelers and artists quietly treasure, but struggle to explain. It truly completes my quest as I journey through the apocalyptic landscape with such a beautifully sounding word.
And just like that -- the lighting changed, feelings faded, and the moment is gone.
The end.
(of time)
