What do you see when you look at this picture?
Never mind! I'll tell you.
When I saw this picture, I thought about how a lady should keep her body chaste and not dress provocatively. What with all the seductive dresses and blouses I see on ladies now, you'll think that they've made the road their run way or they're in their bedroom. Ewwww! Clinging gowns and open breasts and thighs, I mean?
However, yesterday, a friend of mine used it again for her WhatsApp story yesterday and it just spoke to me differently. Somehow it just hit me. You know that feeling you get when you see a cross-word puzzle and you saw only one word but then you look later, and you so many words and you get like "Wait this word dey here before". You know, I just couldn't stop looking at it and see where I've gotten it wrong before and where others are getting it wrong now.
The first thing that comes to your mind is on decency right? how a girl should be chaste and pure. And how her body should be kept unseen and only opened for her husband. Correct! Now look again
What of her mind?
Have you ever been in a relationship or a friend with the opposite sex where you were so open to the person. You opened up your inner core for the person. You let him see you for you, your faults, your mind, your heart. You let him walk through the five chambers of your heart through your eyes and into your soul.
You both know each other so much, or so you thought, but actually, you don't really know much about the other person like he or she does.
And then do you feel so close, so complete, so intertwined with this person? You talk for hours like time can't get to you. You think about him and they're the inspiration to your very actions. You could literally get high sitting close to them and being with them. Don't worry, I know you guys aren't dating, you're only just close. Hehhehhe
And when that relationship is over, when the friendship goes off, you feel empty, you feel naked, you feel like you let them "see" you and now they're gone. So you feel naked? You feel heartbroken, don't you? You feel like you've been stripped off your drugs and you already addicted.
Good! I'm sure you get the picture.
Truth is, to be sincere, I was in this position with someone, a very close friend, almost three years ago. I was so close to him, I let him see through me, through my "nakedness" and let him decide if he'd love it. We were too damn close or rather, I was too damn close. I felt like destiny brought us together, you know and that one day we'd be in a relationship and get married. And oh! It would be so beautiful. We could sit at a place for long and not speak a word and when we do, it would be we were almost thinking the same thing. Truth was, he knew me and had seen my "nakedness " or so I felt. I mean he spoke to my soul and touched me with he words and friendship as if I was being cuddled. His call was heaven and we'd speak like time didn't exist where we were.
And then one day, I found out he was in a relationship and when I asked him, he confirmed. At first, it was OK, we were still close but then, I knew I had to let go. And oh! It was so hard.
Oh! You don't want to know how it hurt. But I couldn't understand why. I'd cry like he was dead gone and I'd feel so empty without talking to him, I wanted to break free from the friendship.
I never knew what was really happening till a friend asked me if we ever had sex. I was like, " Chisos, how would you think that sef?" Hah, we didn't even date sef or kiss naw, not to now talk of sex oh. But she told me I was hurting like we'd had sex. Hah! Sex keh, sex ni.
And I started praying. Yesss oh, I did. And something dropped in my Spirit that day, "A city without walls will have many strangers walk into it."
And somehow, I understood some things. There is what I call the mind sex, my friends who know me, know I talk about this a lot.
Mind sex is deeper than sex and hugs and kisses. It's two soul stripping themselves naked and letting only themselves see this nakedness. It's deeper because it's not physical. It's why a prostitute can have sex and not feel hurt.
Truth is, there is only a level of closeness you should have with a friend or in a relationship not tending to marriage. There's a level of intimacy only meant for your husband and nobody else. Allowing any other person is only room for heartbreak.
I've seen a lot of girls hurt over a friend who isn't even their ex. Well this is because they have let who's not even their husband see them like in the picture above, only not physical. They stand with their soul bare out, waiting for who will notice them.
You see, after that happened, I have never been really close to anybody like that again. I know the limit for a friend and even for a relationship. If there are five chambers to my heart, only your husband should enter the last two courts. That's deepness, intimacy, friendship on fire reserved to only let him experience.
You see how Adam "knew" Eve even before he "knew" her. Go read Genesis again.
So to me, that picture speaks about vulnerability, letting yourself being too vulnerable, letting someone see your naked soul.
So, yes, you could be fully clothed but still be wanting to be seen naked. It's a deep thing. Master your emotions.
So, look at picture again and tell me what you think.
And if you can relate, please let me know too.
Oyovwikefe Stella Ufuomanefe.
