Welcome to Nigeria
I am a patriot & I will not speak ill of my country.
& even if I do, I am on a safe side because she'd never know.
She's on life support.
I pledge to Nigeria my country
to be playful, jovial even in all mess
to swap Nigeria, if needs be, for hundred cents
& if worst come, deny my identity
& let go her honour & pride for a fancy price
so help me God.
• do you not know that Nigeria is a cinema?
few years ago, a drunkard who had no shoes
ran the fast lane into power. He gave it up
to rum one day & said 'stealing is not corruption'
or have you forgotten the actress in Aso rock
who donated her family on behalf of twenty million naira?
It was tragicomic
they left us with moments we often forget to remember.
• do you not know that Nigeria is a zoo?
if any man calls you an animal
tear his cloth and bite him where his hands won't reach.
you're not an animal.
you're Home sapiens. I repeat. you're Homo sapiens.
only that you live in a cattle kingdom.
the fear of cow is the beginning of wisom.
but do not be weary, you cannot become like them
you're wise. say after me, 'I am wise'
you're wise in the way you will not vote
& expect INEC to count your prayer points.
God is a God of wonder & Nigeria is a wonderland.
• do you not know that Nigerians are diehard survivals
Nigeria is the family portrait hung next
to the light switch in our living room.
in the picture, everyone retain their smiles
even though there is storm inside our heads
I once asked my mother if I was the boy in the picture
he did not look like he had bottled butterflies,
heavy shadow & ugly demons all to himself.
she smiled & said it couldn't have been photoshop.
'black and white' is the colour of reality.
Nigeria is the home of longsuffering
& we are all thieves.
sons, ask your fathers if they have never stolen meat.
mothers, look at your daughters & tell them they are not aliens.
they are old enough to suck and be sucked.
they'll use what they have to get what they want.
lover. hear me. you're in a parasitic relationship.
only that we are all preys and we are all predators;
we are all hawks carrying as big as we can.
I am a patriot & I will not speak ill of my country.
& even if I do, I am on a safe side because she'd never know.
She's on life support.
welcome to Nigeria.
