SOMETIMES IT COULD BE TOUGH.

Success they say has many uncles, Aunties and other relatives. But failure or hardship? It has no brother.
A brother is not only related to you by blood but someone born for a time when there is distress. How sad it is to see that when a person is going through hardship or tough times, He/She in most cases hardly see anyone to be there. No one licks your lip for you. You lick it yourself. But when you are succeeding, people would be ready to even wipe your ass after using the toilet.

Everyone face one tough time or the other. Some last long, while some, for a short while. There was, a time in my life when things were rosy for my family. Then, we had many friends, neighbors, fellow worshippers all around us- friendly, helpful and willing to assist in one way or the other. We were happy to help them with their finances too. Some, we even helped to pay school fees for their kids.

But, somehow, things became financially hard, so hard that we almost could not feed. That was the year Banks downsized their workers and Hubby was affected. I was working in a private establishment and the salary was nothing to write home about. Those whom we thought we had saved a righteous riches with, were no where to be found any longer. Even those he had lent money weren't picking his calls.

Unfortunately, I had begun my masters program before then. Amidst the hardship, I managed to finish the course work but I just couldn't cope with the thesis. At first, I thought I could still joggle my Thesis into our financial stress. I did the thesis proposal, where I delivered a seminar in front of my lecturers and some students, explaining what it was about. But I couldn't go further.

I tried to see if I could ask for help from friends, but they said they had nothing. One who was happy to hear that I was running my masters program commended me. In his words, he said "Good!. I have always said it that you haven't reached your potential. Running a masters program is very good". I was happy that I found a helper at last. At least that was what I thought.

But when he heard that he might be the one to borrow me money to complete it, he said he has 100 times more than the money I require. But he is not going to remove a dime from it. In his words, he said "I have a big house I have been saving to buy. I am not ready to take a dime out of the money. Please find a way to finish your masters all the same. It is important you finish up! ".

I was so upset and discouraged. I had no help, not even from family members and that was how my masters program was put to a halt.

IT GOT BETTER LATER
Hubby moved to a town with better opportunities and after much struggle,he got another job and things became better gradually. I had to stay alone with the kids and simplified our lives. I found a trade to engage in to augment my earnings and somehow we managed to get by.

When things got better, I tried to go back to School but I learnt that I had to pay nothing less than 500k before I would be allowed to resume back and finish my thesis.

LESSON
The experience made me stronger not to rely on anyone to help with my case. I only trust in God and struggle to make things better for myself and family.

It has also taught me to help others
but not to expect any help in return. Some humans will always run away when there is trouble.

Additionally, it gave me insight about whom my true friends are. During that stressful times, new acquaintances rallied round us in their little way . But those whom we had taken up their responsibilities as ours, who were always in our house eating, drinking, borrowing money to support their Business or children's school never picked our calls. Rather than helping, one even asked why I allowed my Husband to leave town all in search of a better job. He implied that I may lose him to other women but survival was topmost on my mind. Thank God they are still alive to see how God has been Faithful.

The current situation in Nigeria is crazy but I give God the glory that we have survived and keep surviving, I do not think of going back for the masters any more except if I have a way of travelling abroad. But without the Masters, I have developed myself in my chosen career and keep learning to be the best I can be to stay relevant in my field.

Things happen to teach us lessons and to help us see that there is nothing we have that we did not receive from God. It is not by our might that we are succeeding. Tough times should make us to be more trusting in God's saving power.

Thanks @hivelearners community. It was nice to talk on the tough past to help us appreciate the present and look to the future with a bright hope.