We are blessed with a brain that helps us to think. Our brain is the most creative, dynamic, and adaptable brain among all the species. It helps us to think and to make decisions when we need to do something. So we always think. And thinking generates words that need to be expressed. We always look for someone with whom we can share our thoughts. But there are some times when we don’t have anyone to share our feelings with. Here comes the use of a diary. Once I used to keep a diary with me to write down my feelings on it. I always kept it in my bag so that I could write on it whenever I wanted.
But, for a long time, I didn't write in my diary. So it's not that I didn't write anything. I wrote something in the notepad of the phone. It has an especial advantage. I can write in it whenever my mind wants since I can always carry it with me almost all the time.
However, I find peace when I can write in my diary. Which is may not found even writing thousands of words and thousands of letters in the note. So after a long time, I sat down with the desire to write something in the diary. If you sit down with a diary or notebook before you, a strange idea of writing something will come to your mind. The main fun of writing in a diary is here. This is where the special moment of reunion continues.
Generally, people bleed when they get hurt but my headaches when I see my diary before me but not able to write something on it. I know you have understood my feeling as you are reading this because we all belong to this platform where we all like to express our thoughts by words.
Suddenly, today I am missing my diary a lot. This may be happening as I just want to think a lot out of anxiety. I sank into the abyss of thought. There is no satisfaction in anything until I can write innumerable words circulating in my brain. Yes, I am still writing. But how could I forget my brown-colored notebook where I wrote about my love, my anger, my tensions, my untold stories… That diary was the place where I kept my love that I have lost long ago.
The state of my mind was not good for the last few days. A movie's reel always floats in front of the director's eye again and again, but no viewers see them until they get released in the cinema hall. In the same way, in the world of innumerable unplanned fantasies, thoughts are playing with me again and again. They want to take me to the abyss of tomorrow. I am lost somewhere so no one is watching me get lost. I want to write it in my diary. I want people to find me when I won’t be there to share moments with them.
But I don’t want to be lost so early. I know it’s neither so hard nor so easy to survive in this world if I want to live an average life. But, my dream is to do something significant. I want to motivate people to do something better for the world. I know if there is a little mismatch on the way, I have to drop out of society. If I can successfully cross the whole path of life, it is possible to get some applause, otherwise, the world will not remember me and I will be lost forever.
Though this would be great if I had my brown diary with me but I don’t know why I am missing it that much. Is it so because I don’t have it with me right now? Maybe…
