"Item 1: where do we put the gays."
"First, before anything else: the gloves. Why? And if that's the reason why, why do they wear fucking fiber, absorbent gloves? Elbow long of course, for versatility. I've come to terms with the gloves but the material of said gloves remains, and I believe always will, a fucking mystery. It's simply a poor choice of garment for the hypothetical horrific consequences said gloves were made to acquiesce.
"Maybe-
"Final word on the gloves Melvin."
"To be serious logistically this is a shitshow, Lucy's always has the pedestal in hand but not always a shipment of millions of homo souls on go."
"This wasn't nearly as bad as when he brought MLK up, count your blessings."
"Just a note."
"The note, man. Looking at us exasperated not even mad."
"Dad pretending to read the Bible."
"Man."
" ' The Democratic Daemonic Board of Hell has decided it will no longer be condemning to eternal torture 'the browns' simply for being 'brown'. From this point forward, we have decided to only punish genuine moral compromises, which being ripped from nonexistence and shoved into their grueling material plane encased in a rapidly deteriorating mass of flesh that happens to be 'brown', we have decided, does not constitute. We have employed a number of said human beings as part of our expanding arts program, and of course continue to punish those who deserve it. On that note, at the spring meeting we invite the Heavenly Body to attend a seminar on making Africa not fucked. See attached corporeal footage of baby shooting another baby and then immediately dying of malaria.
What the fuck do we do with that.
Miss you guys, by the way, Dad invented AIDs specifically to target the blacks as he was insulted by their 'overly familiar gregariousness in the face of hardship.' Verbatim.
Yep.
Oh, by the way, I told them that.
Haha.
PS: They prefer to be called black despite the inaccuracy, I don't get it either but it's important to them. Also whichever color you use don't put "the" infront of it. Genuinely don't get how that's offensive but I've never been brown so. Like people say "the french" all the time, "the germans", "the jews"- oh there's another one, kinda.
Love you guys, keep fucking up. Kisses.
Lucy"
"Smug asshole thinks he wield's punctuation marks like a flail."
"We put the gays in the great hall accross the heaven-lake thing. Problem solved."
"We can't segregate the gays dude."
"We sent them to Hell until literally this morning."
"Times change."
"Gays don't, still love fucking gays. Let them do so with some dignity. Accross the lake."
"Yeah the gloves kinda threw that dignity thing through the fucking wall."
"What about lesbians, most unless drunk tend to be rather polite and discrete in my experience. If although bafflingly unfaithful."
"Any gays with elbow length gloves across the lake, the rest just turn the dehumidifier and amp the white noise and
see how it goes."
"All in favor?"
"I'd like to add any gay requiring their partner to take the precaution of said gloves should likely also try accross the lake."
"All in favor?"
"I don't think anyone took care of the malaria babies yet. Let alone the AIDs babies. Africa is certainly still fucked."
"Hm."
"Alright. Africa. Step 1."
"Get rid of the blacks."
"New ideas Melvin."
