Panhandling & Traveling the U.S..... StoryTime Part 2

Hey here is more about me traveling the States, sleeping in my car and begging for food & gas.

So I'm going to start at the beginning where I fell upon this particular lifestyle.

I was in Appleton, Wisconsin homeless and hopeless. Just turned 26 years old in early September 2015. Been homeless before and have successfully able to go to any town, find a job and within three months have a place. Every-time I was broke, sleeping out of my car and didn't know a soul. Yet every time I'd get on my feet, my depression would re-surface and I'd lose everything.

This time is going to be different I told myself. This time I'm going to change what I'm doing, therefore ultimately changing my outcome. Despite what others wanted from me or thought what I coulda, woulda, shoulda done. I stopped caring and talked to a few people who I saw begging outside a Walmart one day and asked a bunch of dumb questions. I inquired about how long, how much and how they were able to do it. I also asked why compared to working a job and what expectations to have. They all told me the same thing, it depends when, where and how generous the people are. Since begging wasn't socially acceptable by the majority of the working class I was a bit nervous about the embarrassment of putting myself out there.

One day in the late summer I simply just did it. I told myself what do I really got to lose? I was already depressed and sleeping out of my car without work. So I wrote on a piece of cardboard, Broke N Hungry, and did way better than I ever thought was possible. My self-efficacy was being built up again, against my self hatred. In addition, where I was begging and the people there really do care about the less fortunate. I was given more money than if I were to work for the same about. Then I asked myself, if I can beg here where else is it legal to beg or panhandle?

Winter was right around the corner and deciding against getting another job and another place, why no go south? If I'm going to be depressed, broke and homeless anyways, what was really stopping me from traveling? The only person stopping me, was me.

The next three weeks I begged and go a map to plan out my road trip. Originally I was thinking about going to the East coast, somewhere vaguely near Myrtle Beach. Instead I later on in the trip changed my mind. I also planned out how long I could drive, what towns I wanted to stop in or near, and the rest was played by ear. I was sick and tired working all the time only to end up with more month than money. I grew up to live my life, not to work myself to death. With no significant other, no kids, or any friends I was like Pinocchio I had no strings on me.

I did actually spend the money given to me on gas, food and minutes for my phone, but I also spent whatever was left over. The rest of the money after paying for the basics was spent on drinks, strippers and watching movies on the big screen. I really kept to myself for the most part, so I did all these things alone. Besides I'm Jesse fucking Wellman, this world owes me nothing and if I don't go out and do something, what am I really living for? A college dropout, without any skills and just feeling like a worthless piece of shit that hasn't accomplished anything working minimum wage or general labor work before this.

It wasn't until early to mid October when I finally left Appleton. I topped of the gas tank, got a Happy Meal and drove as far and as long as I could. I made a radical choice to live, begging most of my way and working day labor on occasion. Made it into Toledo, Ohio where this story continues.

Thanks for reading!

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