TEARDROPS FOR MY MOTHER WHO IS SUFFERING FROM STAGE 2 CANCER
Image source: https://goo.gl/images/exC7eM
Everybody has his own battle in life, people just have to choose what is worth fighting for. Frustrations is part of life, we just have always live to the fullest.
Lately, this January 2018, we had the saddest and baddest news in my entire life - MOTHER IS SUFFERING FROM STAGE 2 CANCER. I do not know how the hell I accepted the news, just imagine that I was shocked. Staring blankly nowhere, I do not know how to composed myself. Then, a river of tears flow already in my eyes. Yes, I cried a millions, I was drowning of sadness. And I am still crying and feeling the pain until now. I do not know, sometimes I just asked myself "Why?"... Just "Why?", What is really happening? My mother is already old, she is 69, and I know her body is already weak compared to younger generations like us. She has gone through a lot of trials and I hope she will surpass this. CANCER is already in our bloodline and I am so wary that mother inheritted it. I was so scared and frustrated. And a realization slapped me on my face and says, "Hey, you must be strong for your mother!" And I just said, "Yes! I must be strong!
Hence, being strong is very subjective. I do not know what is the real essence of being strong now. Knowing that your love one is suffering from cancer. I searched the meaning of strong from Mr. Google and it says:
strong
strôNG/
adjective
- able to withstand great force or pressure
Image Source:
https://goo.gl/images/Yo8Ro6
So, how can I be able to withstand this great force or pressure? Knowing that my mother is sick, and yes suffering from CANCER. How will I be able to comprehend that I can handle this thing easily? Can somebody give me a tranquilizer of "STRENGTH"? Someone help me please! I am really afraid! I fear of losing her! Well yes, this is the reason of my tears. Just like holding my breathe and do not like to face reality. That thinking it will be ok. And sometimes I will just have to pat my back and say "It is really okay not to be okay!" And sometimes I do not like the world to see me cry, to see me weak and to see me awful. I just wanted to shout and say "Hey! Everything will be alright! Take it cool! But d**n, I cannot handle it like that. Yes, I am not so strong! But I still hope for miracle. Hope is what I have to continue fighting. Hope makes me want to embrace that mother will still be with us for longer time.
I know someday, my tears will fade. And everything will have sense. I just have to pray fervently that mother will still enjoy her moments with us-her children and grand children. I just have to be keep still and pray - pray that He will provide the needs of my mother - physically, emotionally, mentally, financially and spiritually. I chose this battle, to fight and fight until my tears will be tired of flowing.
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Thank you for reading. Let us all pray for cancer patients. Thank you for all the support. Please upvote and resteem. This will be a great help for our family. Thank you.
Thanks to @pipo092281 and @jon24jon24 for introducing steemit, @maverickinvictus for proof reading and @steemitfamilyph for all the support.
@surpassinggoogle is a generous person. He is admired by "Ohana". I hope you will support him as a witness by voting him at https://steemit.com/~witnesses and type in "steemgigs".
